My Sister Made Me Read It
#MySisterMadeMeReadIt literally…
Join twenty-something year old sisters, Amy and Abby, each week as they dive into a chosen book to chaotically rant about swoon-worthy characters, characters they can’t stand, and worlds they can’t get their mind off of.
Come ignore reality with your sisters for an hour every Wednesday!
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My Sister Made Me Read It
THE GLOW Review, Dating, and Testing Our Sister Telepathy
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It’s Abby’s Week!
On this episode of the My Sister Made Me Read It podcast, it’s Abby’s week to choose what book we read, and she’s decided on the Literary Fiction THE GLOW by Jessie Gaynor. (7:34:7)
In this episode the sisters dive into not only their thoughts on this book, but books they read in March and plan to read in April, Amy’s dating life, and finish up with some fun games that leave them both dying laughing.
Subscribe and Leave us a Review down below! We want to hear from you and what you thought of The Glow. Give it a rating in the comment section of your rating!
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Credit for Intro and Outro music: This That Shizznit by Beat Mekanik, Free Music Archive, CC BY
I'm still working on this bag of Reese's that you got me.
Track 1Was the ice cream melted?
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525It was not fit and I was worried because when you said that you sent me something, I was already out of the house
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525and I literally had like, just left my house like 20 minutes before and I knew it would be like a long, I had to go sit down and talk to somebody. So I like knew I'd be gone for a while.
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525fuck, I hope she didn't send me ice cream.
Track 1No, like when I ordered it, you're home and then it said like they were going to get to it in an hour and I was like, okay, whatever. Well, they didn't get to it till two hours and at that point you're already gone. I was like, whatever. Like I already put the order in and then, um, I was talking to mom later that night and I was telling her, like, she was like, what'd you get her or something like that. And I was like, yeah. I got her like, ice cream. She was like, ice cream? Was it melted? And I was like, probably. Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525and it's fine.
Track 1Yeah, it should be.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yeah, I want you to know that made me laugh so fucking hard. I was already in like a state of delusion. Like just from like not sleeping. That was Monday, right?
Track 1Yeah, I think so.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525it was Monday.
Track 1Monday, yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525so last Sunday I got like, Horrible news. Um, and I told Abby about it and I literally like just come home on Monday. I like went out and she texted me. I was like, there's something on your doorstep. Like. So nice. Like it was, I was like, Oh, that's so sweet. And I come home and there's just like a fucking peace Lily on my doorstep. And I'm like, what the
Track 1Okay.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525just was so funny to me. Cause I'm just like, not like me, like going through extreme emotional distress and just like my sister, just like emergency
Track 1wasn't even
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Lily.
Track 1It wasn't even like It was like a full on plant. And then like, it was like falling over. Like I was like, it looks like a limp dick.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525beautiful now. It's I'm staring
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525it's bloomed. It's so fucking funny. I like literally, there's no way.
Track 1No, let me tell you, because I wanted to send you flowers, but like, you know, when you do it to like a florist shop, it's always so expensive and they weren't going to be able to get to you by, till the next day, so I was like, I'll just door dash or some shit. So then I realized I could door dash, like, a grocery store. And so I was like, Oh, just do that. And I was going to get you like roses. And then they said like right next to it was just like a picture of a lily and it said like Easter lilies. So I'm thinking it's going to be like a bouquet of Easter lilies. And I'm like, Oh, that's cute. Like I'll get her those
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525It's like
Track 1as a plant. It wasn't that exp it wasn't like, more expensive than a bouquet of roses, so I think we lucked out.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525it's sitting on my kitchen table. Like, Oh my God. But it made me laugh so fucking hard.
Track 1Yeah, I was not expecting that.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525was good, I mean like, that's like exactly what I needed to come home to. I just was like, not a fucking peace lily, like, just like, emergency send.
Track 1Yeah. I told Rose about it later that night, and I was like, I I sent her lilies, but like, look what showed up. We laughed about it for so long. He was like, you sent her a fucking plant. Yeah, I did, apparently.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525made me feel better.
Track 1Were the chocolates melted?
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525No, nothing else has melted.
Track 1See, I wasn't worried about the ice cream. I was worried about the chocolates melting. Like, and like, merging together.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525No, we're all good. good.
Track 1Good.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525That shit
Track 1That's funny.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525though. yeah, what a rough time I had.
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525But all is well, you know, life goes
Track 1All's well. Chocolate and a peace lily can fix it.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yeah, life goes on, you know. It's been fun. Um, I like didn't read for like four days though, cause I was just trying to like disassociate from life.
Track 1Mm hmm.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525But, yeah.
Track 1I've read so much this week, uh, or this month, more than usual because I read, um, the first series that Rebecca Yarris wrote, and It's called Flight and Glory and it's like a cliche like romance series, which I kind of love, but there's five books in the series and I blew through them this month. Like, I was staying up till like three in the morning to read these books. Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I try so hard to stay up late and read, but I get home so late. Like, last night, I got home. Mmm, night wasn't too bad. I got home probably at like midnight last night. Took a shower, and I was like, I want to read. Cause I'm trying to fucking finish Carnage, which is the fifth book in the Lord series. It's the
Track 1Mm hmm.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Lord series. And, like, these books are just so long.
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525long. So carnage is one of the shorter ones. It's 560 something pages, but it's just like, holy shit. And it's like in two parts. So it's just like a lot to get through.
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525trying to like, I'm trying to read it. And I like literally like sat on the couch last night and started reading it. And it's like, I'm at like a really good part. and I just could not stay awake. I kept falling asleep. So.
Track 1are long books though. Like the, the Rebecca Yara's books I read, they were like 300 pages max,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yeah,
Track 1but they flew by really quickly.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525ones. And then like, that vampire book that I started, did I tell you about it?
Track 1I think so, maybe. What was it called? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525it down because like, I wanted to finish Carnage. And, like, it's 800 pages. And like the pages are like paper paper paper thin like, you know,
Track 1Yeah,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525like tissue paper type pages
Track 1but I call them Bible pages. Yeah,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525pages and like the font's really small and i'm like literally like dying like trying to get through it
Track 1it's horrible.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yeah, so I put that one down i'm gonna finish knock out carnage I like i'll pick up vampires again, but it's really good
Track 1Yeah,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525It's really good
Track 1I finished, um, It Ends With Us last night. I finally read it.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I can't get with it.
Track 1Did you finish it?
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I can't get with it.
Track 1Why?
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I've never read them. I don't know.
Track 1Oh, I
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Not
Track 1just didn't like it. Yeah, it was a little different than what I thought. But it's like a classic Colleen Hoover book of like, fast pace. Like, it's, it has depth, but it doesn't have depth. It was just like one of those books. But she has the sequel. Huh?
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Can you hear me chewing?
Track 1No.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Okay.
Track 1She has the sequel for it. And I was thinking maybe I'll go pick it up and read it. Because why not? But I don't know.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I don't know. I've got so much shit that I want to read.
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yeah. Anyways, we just finished, um, The Glow. Did you like it?
Track 1I didn't hate it. Yeah, it's it was a it was like a very slow literary fiction
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I
Track 1book.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525like two weeks ago. I don't really remember it.
Track 1Yeah But
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525it was good, but like, I listened to it. Like, I had it on my Kindle and listened to it. Cause I just wanted to like blast through it. It was entertaining.
Track 1Yeah
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525it.
Track 1It wasn't something that I was like, I have to keep reading I have to keep reading But it was something where I was like, I'm kind of interested where this is going because it feels like it's going nowhere
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525It was just a story.
Track 1Yeah Yeah
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525no
Track 1that's, that's what literary fiction is. Like, it's just, it kind of, there's no, like, twist. There's no big romance. It's just kind of is what it is.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yeah. Like it was very flat. And it was like an entertaining story and it was kind of funny. Like some points were funny. But like It like read like a movie. Like just like a
Track 1Here, let me read the synopsis since we both read it a while ago.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525have the physical thing?
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525big is it?
Track 1Yeah. Not big at all.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525It's pretty.
Track 1I bought this in Charleston. Yeah, I got a signed copy actually in Charleston. But, um, Here, let me read this. Jane Dorner has two modes, PR Jane, 25, chummy and eager to sell you a feminist vibrator or a self care bereavement subscription box, and actual Jane, 29, drifting through mediocre work days and lackluster dates while paralyzed by her crushing mountain of overdue medical bills. When her job performance is called into question, Jane's last ditch effort to preserve her livelihood and pay off her debts is to land a great white whale of a client. Enter the impossibly gorgeous Cass, whom Jane discovers while scrolling through Instagram, and her unassuming husband, Tom, proprietors of W A wellness retreat based out of a ramshackle country house that may or may not be giving off cult vibes. Magnetic yet mysterious, Cass is primed to be an influencer. She speaks in a mix of inspirational quotes and zen cones, eats only zucchini, the most spiritually nourishing vegetable, and has baby perfect skin. Despite Tom's resonance about selling out, Jane wants to transform Cass into a high end wellness brand, offering inner peace while making your skin glow. All at a hefty price, of course. As Jane reckons with her own long dormant ambitions, she wonders, can a person really do good for others while profiting off them? And what parts of ourselves do we lose when we traffic in power, influence, and beauty?
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yeah, that's pretty much the whole book.
Track 1Yeah, it is like the whole book.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yeah. I thought maybe like when we first like picked it up, I thought maybe it was going to go a direction and I don't know why, but I listened to a podcast one time. That was literally just, um, I forget what it was called, but it was just a collection of like fictional short stories. they were like scary stories. Cause I
Track 1Hmm.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525vibe. So,
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525it was like this fucking light sun is fucking killing me, bro. I got to close this. Um, and one of the episodes was like about. Very, like a very similar thing. And it basically was like this lady, like there was like a lady kind of like what's, what's her name? Cass is the head
Track 1Yeah. Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525kind of like the head person and everyone was like obsessed with her. And she had like a wellness retreat that people would go to and go through like these beauty. Like procedures and like become like, it was like a youthful thing. Like there would be like younger
Track 1Mm hmm.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525uh, a girl like went to work there. It was like literally similar vibe, but like ghost sinister. Like she goes to work there and finds out like why these people are like coming out younger and they go through like these beauty procedures that like
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525like steal, like, So like the people who work there She like only hires like really like pretty hot like super young useful people
Track 1Mm hmm.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525who like are employees there. She basically like Somehow like steals their youth and like puts it into like the people who are paying for the retreat
Track 1Yeah,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525so I like thought it might have like a similar like twist to that, but no it was literally just this like who's like a social media manager and like trying to like figure out her place in the world You
Track 1she's basically just trying to like build this business more than it is You know, like make it into more than what it was.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525of like they're they're like fucking cult it's like cast the cult leader, bro
Track 1Okay. So like you talk about it, like I thought the whole time it was going to go sinister too, but like in the beginning, the amount of times she talks about this, like, I think it's a cult or like people think it's a cult. I was like, Oh, this is like going to be a cult. Like I, that's where I thought it was going. And then I thought she was just going to start, instead of like tearing the cult apart, she was going to like join them type of thing.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525She
Track 1be like head leader with Cas, but it's not a fucking cult.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I mean, yeah, hold on one second. I'm trying to take this off. I'm burning I Don't know I think like do you think like Cass is like really fucking like that cuz that bitch is extra as fuck or do You think she was just like? That was like her business
Track 1I don't know because like we didn't even but like remember, um, what's the other girl's name? Jane? She doesn't she goes she finds the shed and like in the shed is like a gallery wall pictures of her And we never really find out why that is
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I don't
Track 1Do you remember that?
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525No. No idea what you're talking
Track 1Remember and then it turned weird and she like masturbated on the floor in this in the shed You don't remember this? Hold on.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Like the group masturbation?
Track 1No, there's the group masturbation, but at one point Tom and Cass are fighting or something and they tell Cass, they tell Jane to like go in the forest and give him space and she finds the shed that like Cass always goes off to to like pray in
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525No.
Track 1worship in and it like has a wall full of
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Pictures of
Track 1of Jane.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525What?
Track 1Let me see if I can find this.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525No, I must have been in a different world. I don't remember that. I don't remember that. I did like, um, Tom though. That was his name?
Track 1Yeah, Tom, Tom and Daniel are like the only two normal people.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Tom was real as fuck. He was like, this bitch is crazy. But, also, like, Felt bad for him. Sad, sad guy.
Track 1He was confusing too.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525you think he was, like, hot? Like, what do you think Tom looked like?
Track 1Here it is. Sorry, let me find where I want to start.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I don't know why I don't remember this. I
Track 1I'm gonna start here. This is page 2 43. There were two small windows on the side of the shed just above her head. She could barely reach them when she stood on her tiptoes, but it was too dark to make anything out inside. When she pushed the front door attentively, it gave like a screen. She felt her pulse quicken, though she wasn't sure if it was from fear or excitement or both. Once her eyes adjusted, she saw a Camp Lantern on her wooden crate. She taped it on. She tapped it on and found herself in a clubhouse she dreamed of as a lonely kid. It smelled like moss and pennies and faintly like Bath and Body Works. On the floor was a nest of blankets and bedrolls she recognized from the house and clusters of fat, colorful fla colorful fl candles. Good lord. The walls were almost entirely covered with dirt. Baytick sheets, save one for one square layered with magazine clippings. Jane had the Law and Order feeling again as she approached it. The clippings were mostly photos of people Jane recognized. Reality stars and A list actors, as well as jewelry, other evidence of abundance. There were a few words, too, all positive. Radiant, fit for a queen, glow. Still, it took her a moment to recognize the sum total as a collage of the sort she might have made in middle school. She looked more closely to see if there was some hidden artistry she was missing. Maybe it was a commentary on middle school collage. She ran her hands over the surface and had the sense of memory of smelling a purple glue stick, pretending it to get high. There was a second crate in the corner, this one crammed full of magazines. Maybe she was on the wall. Um, Um,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Maybe Jane wasn't on any of it.
Track 1So then, Jane picks up a magazine, a Cosmo magazine, and it says, She flopped down on the blanket nest. She felt she had finally been invited to the popular girl's 7th grade slumber party, 15 years too late. Um,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525don't know
Track 1let me jump down.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I think you're wrong, but
Track 1Well, I know she does stuff, cause look. Reading descriptions of physical contact made Jane realize how long it had been since she'd been touched in an ambiguous way, sexual way. Her date with Adrian had been more than two months ago now, and she rerouted her romantic desperation into the pursuit of Cass Industries. Um, this time she reached up her t shirt dress, imagining her fingers belonged to a square jawed ginger on page 54. And then basically she, like, talks about masturbating. And then the next chapter starts. When she woke up, it was dark. She felt sticky like she had been lightly glazed in honey while he slept while she slept. I'm like, gross. So, it wasn't pictures of her. It was pictures of, like, celebrities. I messed that up. I thought this book ended weird, too.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I don't, I don't remember how it ended. I, like, think that, especially like, going back to the shed with the celebrity, Um, that makes me think like, all of it is kind of like a facade.
Track 1Yeah. That's what I thought, I think, when I read it.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I don't know.
Track 1I don't either because, like, the Towards the end of the book when they go to the convention and then they're having dinner with like Daniel and Tom and then the guy that Jane was hooking up with at the time
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I loved
Track 1like
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525the dinner scene.
Track 1It was such like an odd scene and she was putting it on pretty thick.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Well, she, like, it, like, kind of showed, like, that was, like, the first time I felt like there was, like, much, like, emotion out of them. And it kind of showed, like, how, like, difficult the dynamic was.
Track 1Yeah
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525it was, like, okay, Tom and fucking Cass were married. But, like, she I don't know. It was
Track 1She even says like at when Tom is like I've been sleeping with Daniel She's like who is Daniel and it's like you slept with him and you lived with him Like that's a lie. You remember him
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yeah.
Track 1Unless you're like possessed.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525She might have been possessed.
Track 1She had a weird spirit in her.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525It was weird. Who did you, like, think in your head that it looked like, like she, Cass looked like?
Track 1I don't know.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I thought of, what's that actress's name who plays in Gone Girl?
Track 1Oh,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Who also is the mom in Saltburn.
Track 1yeah, I know who you're talking about. I forget her name.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525who I saw as Cass. Just, like, really put together on the outside, but, like, kind of, like, has crazy behind her eyes. You know what
Track 1Yeah, I think that's right. I think that's accurate.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525And I
Track 1I was thinking, I was thinking of the show, which I haven't watched it, so I don't know if this is even accurate, um, with Nicole Kidman and Nine Perfect Strangers.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Mm hmm.
Track 1like, these people go on, like, a wellness retreat and then apparently it, like, takes a turn. I need to watch that. I haven't watched it. But, um, that's kind of, like, what I thought this book was going in the direction of. So that's what I kind of envisioned, I guess, for Cass
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525There
Track 1being, like, a crazy lady and just wanting to control people.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Which I think could
Track 1But,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525it too, but like we didn't really see that How did it end it just like ended like it just like they her and cast just like continued on with the business
Track 1I mean, basically, but the, Tom's mom comes
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Oh,
Track 1to a retreat and then she sends in, like, a letter of, like, review, basically. With pictures of herself and then like it ends and Jane says she like saves the pictures in a folder Like what you would do to be like, I'm saving the reviews to use them later on for business and it ends Which is so odd.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525So odd
Track 1I don't know. I think maybe because we're so used to having books that have like Either greater meanings or like have the twists and turns or like you can read into them a lot more it's like We're reading in a lot more into this book and it's just like a girl who was on a wellness thing and like needed a job and like
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I
Track 1two women.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525i'm like i'm like It has to have a deeper meaning like there has to be something that like we're missing and I think there might be but at The same time like maybe it's just like it just is what it is and that could be the symbolism in it
Track 1Yeah, I read the acknowledgments and she was talking about There was like two people that she that kind of encouraged her to write this book and helped her write it like throughout she would like send them stuff and they would give feedback and like there was never like a Inkling of you know, helping me with this deep like no like deeper meaning or anything it just kind of like I got the impression that it was kind of just like I was just telling a story about a person.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Okay
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I mean, fuck it. We read it.
Track 1Yeah, I mean
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I mean, the fucking, the cover art is, is, I really like the, the aesthetic of the book. So like, it's really
Track 1It makes sense now that i've read it didn't make sense to me when I picked it up
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yeah.
Track 1if she has other books.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525But yeah, anyways, that's pretty much all we have to say about that book.
Track 1Yeah, I will say um, it did remind me a little bit of
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Big Swiss.
Track 1swiss Yeah, see that's like her only book.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525like the same writing style, but like I adored big Swiss, like there was storylines. There was like, like,
Track 1Oh, she has a podcast
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525there was like a lot to hold on to with big Swiss,
Track 1Yeah, definitely
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525what's this month. Oh, we just got into April. What did
Track 1Yeah
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525read this in March? Why can't I fucking remember what I've read in March, bro? I think, I think I fucking finished. Let's see. Okay, I read in March, let me see, The Glow. I finished A Court of Silver Flames, so I'm done with
Track 1Mm hmm
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Literally,
Track 1didn't know, pause, I didn't know she was still writing that series.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525oh yeah.
Track 1I didn't know that. I thought it was done.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Abby, when I fucking tell you, like I know like people like love ACOTAR so much and I do so fucking much. Like it's the, but it like doesn't even feel like a, like you can compare it to anything. It's like its own thing.
Track 1Mm hmm.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525A Court of Silver Flames, and people like hate on that one so much, like they think it's like the, like some people like think it might be like the worst one aside from the novella. I have never read a better book in my fucking life. I'm not kidding. Like, I, when I tell you, like, I'm going to force my future partner to read the entire series just so they can read Silver Flames. Because like, The way that like that book, I've never resonated more with a character in my life.
Track 1Mm hmm.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525It's so good.
Track 1I've officially decided I'm going to read all of them in the month of July.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Abby, if you don't I'm gonna fucking scream. Like
Track 1No, I am. I just, I just like know I'm gonna get so like enthralled with them that I'm gonna be up every night till three in the morning reading and I just can't with my schedule the next few months.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I don't think that's necessarily true. I think like you'll be fine, but like it is so fucking good and my friend Chloe just bought the whole series So she's gonna start it and I'm just like So excited It's so It's just really good. Like I
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525the entire series like every single book made me cry but silver flames I had to like physically put the book down and get up and be like I am not okay like
Track 1Did you know she um, started the series when she was 16?
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525No, that's a throne of glass. She started
Track 1it Throne of Glass?
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525hmm
Track 1That's crazy to me.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525starting thrown in glass next I think i'm going to start it next month because I it's an eight book series and I know that I'm gonna just dive
Track 1Is that one finished?
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yes.
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525So, um I'm, really excited to start throwing a glass, but i'm not going to start it yet but I just have like a tendency to like gravitate towards series and feel like Like when I do like a series like those books are so such high priority to me Like other books kind of fall to the wayside and I like want to read so many other things
Track 1Mm hmm.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525So I don't want to start a new series like i'm about to finish the lord series But I feel like I haven't really been able to focus on other books starting the lord series because
Track 1Mm hmm.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525such high priority know
Track 1Yeah. I was telling Jose that the other day, like, this is The Rebecca Yarrow series I just read was the first series in a while that I've read. Like, multibook series. I think I've read like some sequels and stuff, but like multibook. And it's like, I really enjoy reading series. I forgot how much I enjoy it. Because, I, I don't know, you just like kind of, he was telling me he's reading, um, a fantasy series and it like, well, he's reading a few, but like, they're not finished yet. And so he like, hasn't had a series that has like a finality to it. And he was like, I'm like really craving something. And I was like, yeah, like I get that. Cause I just had that with my series.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525You would hate the lord series
Track 1Yeah. Mm
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525good though, like it's so fucking good It's one of my favorite series I've ever read. And like, it's so like, it is extremely, extremely dark
Track 1hmm.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525very, like descriptive, like with like sex and stuff, but like the storyline, like she does such a fucking good job with the storyline. It's so
Track 1I think I might pick it up just, just so we could talk about it.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525It's so suspenseful like the storyline is so good and like she weaves like all of the characters are like weaved in and everything like goes back to one thing
Track 1Mm hmm. All right.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525parts and like it just makes you not want to put them down like right now like in carnage like there was a scene in um, the sacrifice which is the fourth book. There's a scene in the sacrifice that had. main component of the carnage book in it So when you're reading the sacrifice and you see this scene you're like what the fuck and then you want to know what happens But what happens like that storyline is the carnage storyline So then you're like, oh my god, so I was reading carnage and you like re see that whole scene from their perspective
Track 1Yeah,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525It's just like the way like she weaves it all in is so good
Track 1yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525It's so good. I love it
Track 1We went to, um, the Mall of Georgia this past weekend to go do some things. And I was like, can we just go to Barnes and Noble? I haven't been in that Barnes and Noble in so long. And it's so big. So I was like, let's go in. And of course I bought a few books.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525What'd you
Track 1Um, well, I bought Bride because we're going to be reading that coming up,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525too, I bought it
Track 1but, um, I bought Butcher in the Ren because I haven't read that yet
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Oh my god, I'm so excited!
Track 1her, and her sequel is coming out soon. So,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525in September, I gave Butcher in the Wren to Melanie to read.
Track 1yeah, so I bought that one.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525in the Wren.
Track 1And then, um, I read this book a while ago when it came out and I did not like it at all. Have you heard of this one?
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yes! I literally picked it up yesterday in Target.
Track 1I'm gonna give it another shot because I feel like I didn't do it well. So I'm gonna reread it and she came out with a sequel to it so I brought the sequel.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yeah.
Track 1Yeah,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Interesting.
Track 1I brought the sequel.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Interesting. Mm
Track 1I think it's a young adult romance so it's not like kind of what we're used to I guess. It's the same idea of like how Divine Rivals just didn't really do it to us. I think it's gonna be like in the same note.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yeah
Track 1I saw um, what's the sequel to Divine Rivals? Ruthless Vows. I saw that and I was like, I can't buy it.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525know I can't spend my money on it.
Track 1No either.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525i'm gonna wait. I'm sure it'll pop up on kindle unlimited soon
Track 1I don't know about soon, but I think yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525And when it does i'll probably fucking read it because I do want to read it Like I was talking to mel about it the other day. Like I do want to fucking read it, but like It's just not high priority
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525And like I have so many other books that I want to read right now and like honestly abby like You I think like getting into dark romance has ruined me because I don't want to read anything if it's, if it's like mild. You know what I mean?
Track 1Yeah. Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I don't know. I'm like, like I get like the ick from it.
Track 1Yeah. That's why I try not to like hone in on a certain genre because
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I
Track 1then nothing else like is enjoyable to me. I like to like read a romance and then read a fantasy and then read a literary fiction and then read this and then read like something different all the time,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525yeah.
Track 1but I don't know.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525It's hard.
Track 1Young adult, new adult, adult, like. Even just like age range.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Young
Track 1young adults are good.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525bad. I'm just like, ugh. Like, Melanie's reading Carnival right now.
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Carnival.
Track 1Yeah, something like that.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525she liked the first one, and she just finished the second one, and is going to go into the third one soon, but she was like, Reading like the epilogue of the second one and I guess they like said like how a character was 16 and she was like What the fuck like? Excuse me, I'm like that's literally how I felt when we read that. Uh, what
Track 1The summer
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525summer broken
Track 1rules.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I was like, are these like 12 year olds like what is happening? Dude speaking. Okay Can we talk about my personal life for a second
Track 1Yeah, sure.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525So I went on a date, you know, I like, um, that was, thank you for the encouraging eyes. Cause
Track 1Well, you just looked at me like you wanted a response.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525say anything
Track 1Because all you said was I went on a date. Why did I say that? Good job? Oh,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525me like, Anyways, um, I went on a date on Sunday, so I met this guy and, um, I'm not going to give too much information cause it's like a super, super, super new obviously, but like I'm so into it and this guy is so like like man, like a man, like this is a fucking man. Abby, I'm not giving specifics. Okay. Um, this man is younger than I thought he was,
Track 1God.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525but I'm going to go with it.
Track 1Just say how many years younger he is than you.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Okay. Hold on. Let me do six. I know.
Track 1Okay, on to the next one.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Six
Track 1You're like Christian Cavalieri.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I know, Abby. And it's like, but like, and he's so like mature and shit. And like we talked and I've never had better conversation. Like we had a great conversation. We went on a date on Sunday and literally closed the restaurant down. We were there for over four hours. And like it did not
Track 1That's good.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525it.
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525And I have to tell you this one thing that he did. So while leading up to it, He texted me on Sunday and all he said was, um, uh, tables reserved for eight. And I was like, smash. So he like made it, I mean like the bars in the basement, but he like made a reservation and just was like tables reserved for eight o'clock and I'm like that perfect.
Track 1Appreciate it. Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yeah. Like what the fuck men don't think like that these days, at least men my fucking age.
Track 1Yeah. Mm
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525And then at dinner, like it was great. We were having such a good time. And, um, I was like, I think they're like closing cause they like closed at midnight. So, and we were, it was like kind of like a lounge vibe. So we're like in like these loungy seats. It's like low seating
Track 1hmm.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525um, Abby, when I tell you, I didn't even notice this man do anything like literally kept eye contact with me the whole time we were having a conversation and the waitress walks by and he just goes like this. And holds his card up like so smooth. Like as she's walking by, doesn't break eye contact with me at all. And she just like, it's like, Oh, and like takes the card. And I was like, and she, and he like, didn't even like eye contact. He just like holds up the card and she like grabs it. And she's like, Oh, I'll bring you the signed receipt. And he was just like, thank you. And I'm like, like, didn't like look at the bill. Nothing. Just like, here's my card, but not bitch. He was just like, here's my card. He
Track 1He was,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525respectful.
Track 1was reading.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525call the waitress bitch. He was so respectful, so nice to service team, like so nice to the servers. Like, thank you so much. Like shit like that. Right. Oh, loved it.
Track 1All good signs.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Huh? All
Track 1All good signs.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525only one small concern. So the age,
Track 1okay.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525it's like a little, it's, it's not, I wouldn't say it's a concern because all like his qualities are different and he, like a really solid job. He was raised by a single mom too. So I think like that has a lot to do with it.
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Um, but he was so respectful, like walked me to my car, like whatever, whatever. We chatted and like, when I went to like leave, he was like, I was like, okay, like bye, whatever. And like, was just like standing outside the car and he was just like, Okay, like I'm not walking away until you're in your car, like get in your car and like close
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525door and like, just like shit like that. Like I
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525you
Track 1we all deserve shit like that.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Well, and I was like, like something that like, I know, like you even know, and I've said to you is like, I have been on my own for so long and I'm already so, so, so, I'm already so like hyper independent and I have like a very like assertive masculine energy to me anyways. Like I need someone to like overpower that sometimes and
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525did that. Like I mean I know it was just like one date but like it was refreshing.
Track 1Well, you just need to like to feel safety with somebody to the effect of like, you don't have to be. On alert 24 seven.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Right.
Track 1by myself, I'm on alert 24 seven. And especially if I'm like in the city or something. But if I'm with Jose, I'm like flamboyant. Like,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525just
Track 1what's going on half the time, like he's taking care of everything.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525And then yesterday. So we both work, obviously we're both working adults
Track 1Mm hmm.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525and we were texting yesterday and I texted him like back and forth, whatever. And I didn't get a response from him. Like I texted him at like three 30
Track 1Mm hmm.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525and I hadn't heard from him. And it's like six o'clock. Right.
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I didn't even think twice about it. Like, I know he's at work. I'm at work. Like I, whatever. You
Track 1Mm hmm.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525talk to you 24 fucking seven. Like I
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525to. And he texted me at six 30 and said, I'm not ignoring you. Just been busy for the second half of the day. And I was like, that's literally all it takes. It's like,
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525wasn't thinking you're ignoring me, but like, thank you for saying that.
Track 1I was, I was going to say, like, I don't know if age is like a huge, Like I don't know if it should be an issue because sometimes like younger people and I think I can speak on it because i'm Younger and like I was always mature for my age like sometimes people who are younger just like I could let me just say this I When I met jose at 20 years old, I could never imagine dating another 20 year old Because like we just weren't aligned with like maturity people were like still going out and drinking and partying and that was never me And so like I went for a little bit older To match my maturity age You And I feel like I found my match in that. So like, and I'm not saying you're downgrading. I'm saying he's upgrading to maybe he's just that mature. And like,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yeah.
Track 1think it is the similarities of like having a single mom who raises you right.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525And like, I have always dated older and like my ex boyfriend was younger than me. And he was just the absolute worst. but like, still is the absolute worst. Like he's never matured at
Track 1No,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525foresee him ever maturing. So it's like, I think it like, just, I don't, I don't know.
Track 1I think it's just important to have for him to have the qualities, like qualities of having like an ambition and wanting to do things with his life and like a future and wanting to always better himself. I think that's really important when you're finding like a match with somebody
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yeah. And
Track 1no matter their age.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525you know, I'm always nervous to like, talk about like my sobriety with people. Like, just
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525never sobri, something that I've learned in my sobriety is like, sobriety makes people uncomfortable.
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525it really does and um, so i'm always like not nervous But just like i'm prepared for people not to react like positively to it.
Track 1Yeah. Yeah,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Like, why do you stop? Why did you stop drinking? And i'm like, that's kind of like a rude question like
Track 1I don't get that.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525question, but like um he Reacted so well to it. He's like he told me he was proud of me. I'm like, that's like, okay You He was like, that's really admirable and like, really like inspirational that like
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525do that. And I'm like,
Track 1It is.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Like, yeah, it is. And it's something that I'm really proud of. And he was like, so okay with it. I like went through three Pellegrinos and a wine glass on our date and he had like two glasses of like fucking whiskey and it's fine. It was like fine.
Track 1Mm hmm.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525a big drinker, doesn't like do drugs, doesn't smoke, doesn't do anything.
Track 1Mm hmm.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525So I like love that because people that I've dated in the past like fucking drug dealers potheads
Track 1Well, they use, yeah, they use stuff to numb the pain sometimes.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yeah, so I don't know it was
Track 1Well, hopefully it goes well. It sounds like it's good.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yeah Yeah, it was fun like we were like sitting and I was just like i'm having like such a good time and he was like Me too, like this is great
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525you know, like what else is he's a fucking leo and I think that has a lot to do with it
Track 1Probably.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525super compatible with leos And I just loved the energy You
Track 1What birthday is Leo?
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Leo's like august
Track 1what I thought.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yeah, like early august. What's before august july
Track 1I was just, I was thinking the same
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525think it's like late july early august because
Track 1thing. Yeah. Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yeah It was fun
Track 1That's like how Jose and I were. We, um, every time the first few times we hung out, it was like we were closing down the restaurant or it was three hours. We went to a play in Lawrenceville and we sat in the parking deck and sat there and talked. And I told him all about like my life. I told him all about dad. And this was like our second date.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Mm
Track 1And we sat there for four hours and just talked in the parking deck.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yeah how
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525like and it just like felt like I felt so Comfortable like I could like be myself and he was so validating like he kept just saying like love that. Like, I love that. Like he like kept saying that to me, like after like things that I would like tell him about me and I'm just like, thanks.
Track 1I am the shit, aren't I?
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I know. Thank you. waiting for someone to validate that.
Track 1Yeah. Well, that's what you need in life. Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I've been, cause I love like. Words of affirmation and like physical touch and like validating things like I really am into shit like that So like when I'm like with a partner like I feel like I love people in those ways and like some people just don't like that and it makes me feel like I'm Um, like with my ex, like I would like try to validate him and like give him like words of affirmation and like shit like that. And he'd be like, I, I know, like, stop telling me these. And I'm just like,
Track 1Oh,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525you. Like,
Track 1okay. Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525know? So like with someone who like, Like can receive those things then also in return give them back to me I'm like, yeah, I fucks with this and that's
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525That's like heavy Leo energy to like Wanting like validation and shit. Like I love it.
Track 1Yeah. I think men in general, like Have a hard time accepting comp like I work on it with Jose sometimes of like, can you just accept my compliment? You know, like it's hard for them to accept them, but I think it's really important for them. Jose and I have those conversations all the time because we want kids in the future and like how are we gonna raise our kids? And I always tell him like if we have a son, I'm gonna raise an emotional son. Like I'm not raising them the way like Jose was raised very similary similary?
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Okay. Yes
Track 1Like, Jose was raised to like, like dad
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Uh
Track 1in the same sense of like, you have to be hard. Men don't have emotions. You just provide.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Uh
Track 1And I tell him all the time, like, I'm not doing that shit.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525like that?
Track 1You don't?
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I don't know I feel like dad was pretty very was emotional
Track 1Yeah, I think so too. I don't think, yeah, I don't say that to say that.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525without like telling us he loved us You
Track 1Because grandpa never told him he loved him.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525No. True. Okay. I see what you
Track 1Like, and that's why, and Jose is the exact same way.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yeah.
Track 1tells me all the time, like, I won't be like my father.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Dad was very, very like, I guess validating is the right word, but like, I never went a second without thinking, you know, Dad didn't like adore
Track 1us. Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525We were like the light of his lives.
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525he made sure we knew it. Yeah. That's like why, like when sometimes like I, and as you're right, like, especially with men, like men that like I date or just like men that I know and they like, or like, yeah, my dad doesn't tell me he loves me. I'm like, what,
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525mean? I
Track 1It's so common.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525dad doesn't kiss me. My dad doesn't like this. Like my dad doesn't hug me. I don't like talk to my, like, that's fucking crazy to
Track 1Mm hmm.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yeah, I mean like I understand it but like that was not our experience at all
Track 1No, no.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525either
Track 1But I,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I mean, yeah, maybe
Track 1we can't get rid of mom.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Mom was like i'm fucking you bitches
Track 1Mom's like, leave me the fuck alone.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Mom was real as fuck for that And he loved every second of it like
Track 1Yeah, he did.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525but
Track 1Um, Yeah, I mean, just going back to it, like, I think it's really important to find a, it's, what it is at the end of the day is emotional intelligence. And like, and like, the acknowledgement of it for men and like, knowing that like, we as a society kind of need to heal that aspect in our society, I think is really important. And I think that's going to come from our generation of like, the next, raising the next generation.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Mm hmm. It's very like there's like a it's a hard line though, because it's like I don't know because there's so there's such thing as being like emotional intelligence without being like soft
Track 1And yeah, I don't think they go together.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yeah
Track 1I think an emotional intelligence is just being able to reflect on yourself and your behaviors and be able to, like, appropriate, like, appropriately react.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Right and like
Track 1Like, like a lot of, like, a lot of men who don't have that often become defensive easily. They have too much pride. They then point fingers. I would say, like, I would even venture to say, like, a lot of men who are aggressive towards other people have lack of emotional intelligence.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Oh
Track 1Like the inability to point the finger back at themselves and be like, what am I doing wrong? That's creating this situation.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525that's going around and it's like this it's it's Like a thirst trap TikTok, which is my entire for you page. But it's like this guy and he's like, it's like, um, men who are raised by their fathers. And it's like this guy, like trying to fight somebody. And then it's
Track 1I have seen that
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525their mother. And he's just like standing there,
Track 1Standing there looking at you. Yeah, but it's accurate.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525And I'm like, that's so accurate
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I mean, like not always, you don't, you know, not, we don't speak in absolutes, but like, yeah,
Track 1Yeah,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525it's funny. It's funny. I don't know, dude. We'll
Track 1we shall see
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525We'll fucking see. I'm not putting all my eggs in one basket, but I am
Track 1It's fine.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525just in case,
Track 1I Am shaving my legs
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525but my cooter is hairless. I'll tell you that I shaved my butt crack.
Track 1punani
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I swear to
Track 1Gross.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I swear to God.
Track 1Uh
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525one day and I said, Ooh, booking a pedicure.
Track 1oh. Maybe I should be doing this.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yeah. I'm not.
Track 1but,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yup.
Track 1uh, gross.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525So that's how my life is going. I mean, and it's so fucking funny because I went through such trauma like a week ago.
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525but you know what, bitch? Like, and I went the fuck through it. Like, I know like me and you haven't really talked about it too in depth, but like, I'm sure you probably talked to mom a little bit. fucking went through it. Like I
Track 1Yeah. Mm-Hmm?
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I was not
Track 1Mm-Hmm.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525But I. to said person, listen, I'm going to, going to fucking have my moment
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525be fine. And that's exactly what I did. And I like went through it. I let myself feel what I was feeling for not even three days. And bitch, when I tell you like, I could not give a fuck right now.
Track 1Mhm.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I'm so I'm, I'm the most
Track 1Well, that's what I told you and that's why I sent you flowers and chocolate and ice cream because it's like, take your time and feel your feels so you can then get over it.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yeah.
Track 1Because I've learned in my 25 years of life that if I don't feel my feelings, I harbor them for, like, for years. And then I'm, I, it all comes to an end and I'm like, why the fuck am I still feeling this?
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525And
Track 1And I get angry.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525and this is what I'm telling all of my friends who are, who are telling me like, and my, my closest friends are, are hurting, were hurting with me and some of them are still hurting
Track 1Mhm.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525angry. And I, I told them, I was like, have the best group of friends, like ever. Like, it's insane. I'm so lucky. And I told all of them, I mean, they banded around me and I was like, you guys. I'm so lucky that I have you guys to be angry to give me the space to feel this and be sad And they all just like stood around me like a fucking shield and were mad for me while I could kind of heal
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525And that's like exactly what I needed and i'm really lucky that I was able to have that And they're all still angry and like I was talking to them like literally just two days ago that they're still feeling these feelings of like anger and resentment and I'm telling them like they're like I don't know how you're okay. Like, how are you doing this? How are you? Like, like one of them was like, you're fucking strong as shit. And I'm like, dude. I'm suffering a little bit still. Like I, I can't lie. Like this is painful for me, but who the fuck is it hurting?
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I'm not going to feel, I'm not going to continue to be upset and be angry towards these people because like all it is doing is hurting me and I am not, I don't want to feel those feelings. So I'm not going to,
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525it go move on with my life and it's fine, and that's what I've been able to do. Cause
Track 1think that's good.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525when you like hold resentment and anger towards people for their actions and I can't change what's going on, I can't change the
Track 1Mm hmm. Yeah,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525So fuck it. What am I going to do? All I can do is choose
Track 1your reaction.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525that I react towards it. And I feel like I've reacted very appropriately
Track 1Yeah, I agree. I think it's good that like you and your friends gave you the space to be able to have those feelings because I think oftentimes, too, like, there's that innate, like, just get over it. Like, it's fine. I didn't even have a right to be upset type of ideal. And especially put that's pushed on women of like, get over it, get over it, you're emotional, get over it. So I'm glad that you guys had that space.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525yeah, no, they, they banded around me and they. Yeah, like let me
Track 1I think at the end of the day, like, that relationship and all the other relationships you've had and then this guy that you've been talking about, I think it's just learn from him. Like, you didn't like how you were being treated, you still like how you're being treated by your ex. Like, you enjoy the fact that this guy that you've just had dinner with treated you differently and, like, treats waitstaff differently and, like, all these different things and, like, if this guy doesn't work out, at least you can go forward knowing, like, I rather that than that.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Oh, fuck. Yeah
Track 1And it, like, it becomes like a funnel of, like, you're getting closer and closer to finding someone.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525like I am so comfortable in my singleness and like that's why it's hard for me to date because it's just Like I would much rather like I literally went on a date one time Semi recently and I just like immediately knew that it was not gonna fucking work out and I just was like, you know What i'm gonna go home like it's fine I
Track 1Mhm.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525but like i'm not trying to play with people's time or feelings like is not gonna work I'm, just gonna head out like I would just rather Be on my own than be in something like that
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525and Like I Fucking word to lala can't like i'm just a bitch in these streets trying to rebrand and get a sperm donor. Like i'm Like that could be my like i'm so down for that being my life But
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525like a partner comes in then great but like i'm at the point where it's just like
Track 1Life is great with a partner when the partner's the right partner. It's the worst when it's not.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yeah, but it's definitely not something I need like i'm very like aware that like like I was telling people This is kind of funny. I feel like we're all over the place. But whatever this is fun
Track 1It's okay.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I was not I've like told people like my life. I feel like life is gonna go two ways
Track 1Mhm.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525and maybe i'm wrong I could absolutely a hundred percent fucking be wrong. But who
Track 1Mhm.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525my like Idea of how my life's gonna go as of now. Um, i'm either number one going to Make a fuck ton of money and just be on my own and get a sperm donor and have my own babies and never have to share my kids with any human ever
Track 1Mhm.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525to worry about that. And I would be so unbelievably happy. You guys have no idea. Like
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525fulfill me. Like I just want to be a mom so I could do that. My life could go that way.
Track 1Mhm.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Or. I think i'm a fucking second wife, bitch. I think my husband Might be like happily married right now or maybe like not happily married but like my husband got married to like a high school sweetheart At a super young age, Like they got married at like a super young age, had kids and like, just realized like in their late twenties, like, Hey, like we're not each other's person and that's fine, but like, we got married super, super young and they have like an amicable split and like, everything's great and
Track 1Mhm.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525dating him and he's like, Oh, this is my soulmate. This is like who I'm supposed to be with
Track 1Mhm.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525ex wife are BFFs. like take the kids out.
Track 1Yeah,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525just like a second wife. That could happen.
Track 1could happen.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I think that might be my journey. Or I date a super young guy who's emotionally mature and I'm a cougar.
Track 1Rawr.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Gross. Jesus fuck. That was so gross and cringey. Oh my god. What the fuck was that?
Track 1That reminded me of like middle school,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Oh,
Track 1kids would go rawr.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Roar. I hated that. that. I hated that.
Track 1Oh, I'm so hot.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525okay. Ready? Ready?
Track 1What? Penis. Who
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525What? Not penis. I'm staring at a candlestick. Okay. Okay. Okay. Word association. Uh, can. Oh, okay. Good soup. Oh my god, that shit is so fucking funny. I die.
Track 1Alright, ready? Word association.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Pee.
Track 1Okay, ready? Word association. Dog. I
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525What the fuck did you say? Dog toenail.
Track 1don't know what else to say. This is hard. Word association. Holiday.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I can't. Suddenly I don't speak English. Holiday bunt cake.
Track 1What the fuck? We've never had bum kicks on holidays.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I don't know. I don't know. Um, Uh, word association. Uh, nature trail.
Track 1Dirt.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Dirt.
Track 1Dirt.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Have you ever done the game with people where it's like, you
Track 1You have to finish it.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525huh?
Track 1You have to finish it.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525No,
Track 1Explain it.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525like a word so like we both would get one, two, three, and then say a word and then we'd have to like to the same word.
Track 1Oh, no, I've never played this. Do you want to do that?
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525You want to do it?
Track 1Yeah. Do we have, like, guidelines?
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525No guidelines.
Track 1Okay.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Okay, um, let me think of a word. Okay, ready? Three,
Track 1two,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525one, fire. Okay.
Track 1Okay, ready?
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Um,
Track 1know this. You know this.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525three, two,
Track 1one,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525bonfire. Fire. What? It was this so confident, you know this, you know this.
Track 1Okay. Wait, you said bonfire?
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Bonfire.
Track 1Okay,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525you said water. three, two, one. S'mores.
Track 1Oh, okay. Okay. Okay. No, no, we know this one now.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Uh. Okay, you said wood and I said s'mores.
Track 1Okay, ready?
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Three
Track 1and s'mores. Three?
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525like, telepathically trying to tell me something and I just don't see it. Okay,
Track 1Okay.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525three,
Track 1two, one.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525one,
Track 1Chocolate.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525OH
Track 1Oh.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I WAS GONNA SAY BITCH! I was gonna say chocolate, I swear on my life.
Track 1Okay.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525thinking chocolate like, wieners.
Track 1Oh. What?
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525He said ow.
Track 1Okay.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Fuck.
Track 1stick?
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I said stick and you said chocolate.
Track 1Oh, okay. Stick
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525You're so confident here. Like I have no idea.
Track 1and chocolate. Ready?
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I'm not ready. I have no fucking clue. Okay, last one. If we don't get
Track 1This is, yeah, then we're changing it up.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Three two
Track 1one.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Hershey's
Track 1dog. Oh.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I was staying with the chocolate theme.
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525we suck at this.
Track 1Yeah, we do. You want to do one more?
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Sure. Okay. No, no, let me think of a word. Uh, okay.
Track 1Ready? Three,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525two, one. Jacket. Wow. So different.
Track 1So different.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Uh, three. Mm hmm.
Track 1Okay. Three, two,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525one.
Track 1raincoat. Okay.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525said raincoat?
Track 1Yeah. Three, two,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525it up on
Track 1Oh, I know what I'm going to say.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Raincoat and beach. Raincoat and beach. Uh,
Track 1Two things that go with both of them. Or one thing that goes with both of them. Raincoat and beach.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525uh, okay. Okay.
Track 13,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Two,
Track 12, 1
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525storm.
Track 1Umbrella.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525You're so good at this. Okay, umbrella and storm. Okay.
Track 1We're onto something.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525We're on the same path. Um.
Track 1Oh, I know what I'm going to say.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Okay.
Track 1Stay with the theme.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Three,
Track 1two,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525one,
Track 1rain boots. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Stay with the theme. Stay with the theme.
Track 1I was a lightning.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Oh my god, I'm so glad we got there.
Track 1That's funny.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525so glad we got there.
Track 1Do we have anything else we need to talk about?
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Um,
Track 1I think my stray cat's pregnant.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525That's insane because my friend Mel, um, took in a stray cat and she's also pregnant. So she is, like, given birth any day now.
Track 1I'm scared she's going to give birth while I'm at mom's.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525She'll be
Track 1So I'm gonna, yeah I'm gonna set up, I have a box out there, I'm gonna clean up the box today.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525took her to the vet to, like, get her spayed and they were like, this cat's pregnant. And,
Track 1yikes.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yeah, so she's like, like ready to give birth, but she already found somebody to adopt her. They named her Violet. She's fucking adorable. Um, and Mel's just waiting on the, the kittens to be born, and then we're gonna have to like figure out what to do with the kittens, but I can't wait.
Track 1yeah. No.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525one, but there's no fucking way. My
Track 1No.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525have them for dinner.
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yeah, they don't get along with cats, so Yeah, so she's just trying to find and like a lot of like rescues and stuff will take kittens in so
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525option but Yeah, that's crazy
Track 1If we had, like, a spare bathroom, I would take him in and foster him. We just don't have the space for it here.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yeah, I
Track 1Like, I just don't have any space where, like, Luna could be okay and then, like, I just have them somewhere in a closet or something, like,
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525cats Like if there's like I know there's more than one like you should take them to like a spay place and get them spayed
Track 1yeah, I'm going to I think I'm going to focus on that when I get back from Mom's. Because that's Two of them are kittens, so I knew they were too young to be able to do that. But I just feel bad, cause like, we're thinking about moving. Like, I'm gonna move and I'm just gonna leave them here? Like, I feed them twice a day.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I
Track 1They come back to my house.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Maybe
Track 1So I think I'm gonna
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525for them
Track 1Yeah. The people next door want one of them, but If they were like cute and like they would come and cuddle on me I would do it but like they still are like hissy and like panicky.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yeah,
Track 1So we'll see. We'll figure it out.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525mean they're outside cats
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Um
Track 1what is the name of the book we're reading for next week?
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525It's called grief is a thing with feathers.
Track 1It's a short. Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525it's really short, but I just like, I saw it in the bookstore like a while ago and I was like, I'm buying this book. Like it looked like really good, but it's really fucking short. It's like about like a dad who has like three, I think it's three young boys or two young boys and his wife passes away. And it's kind of like. About them, like kind of healing from that trauma throughout their lives. But it's has like an element of like, and I don't necessarily know until we read it, but it has like an element of like a, I think it's a crow comes into their lives and, um,
Track 1Kind of like a spiritual element.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525yeah, kind of like guides them through like their grief. So hence grief is a thing with feathers. Just like, I think it's going to be a very sweet.
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Story it's going to be sad I think but we'll knock that out We'll talk about that and then we'll start bride. I'm
Track 1Yep. Me too. Yeah. When I.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I've
Track 1I was checking Oh! You go first.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525okay
Track 1You go, you're older.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Okay, fair fair, um, I don't remember what I was gonna say. Oh i've heard like mixed things about it Can you hear me? Okay, I just pushed something. I've heard mixed things about it, but I know like this author, it's like her first in this genre. So I think people who are used to her books
Track 1Yeah. Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525it's her book and they're not liking it because it's not their preferred genre.
Track 1Genre, yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525But if you like that genre, people are liking it.
Track 1Yeah, when I, um, was checking out at Barnes Noble, the lady was like, this one's flying off the shelves. Like, she was like, everyone's buying this book. And I was like, yeah, I was like, I have to
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525it,
Track 1I'm interested.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yeah, when I bought it, the guy was like, I'm reading this one right now. It's like a good palette cleanser and I'm like, okay, cool. But like, I'm interested to see how it's going to like turn out because it's, described as a paranormal romance.
Track 1Is it?
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yeah, but I don't know what that necessarily means because it's about werewolves.
Track 1I heard there's a possible sequel, like sequel, like there's a possibility for a sequel and she was saying that it's not going to be the next book that she releases but she is considering writing a sequel to it.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Yeah, I think we'll get through it quick. I like, I mean, I like shit like that, so it should
Track 1Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525So yeah, so I'm going to read, I'm going to finish Carnage probably in the next few days and then I'll knock out Grief is a Thing with Feathers and then I'll start Bride.
Track 1Okay.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525then this month I want to fucking read, um, Ice Planet Barbarians.
Track 1Did she tell me about that? I don't think so.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Oh my god. I'm so excited. It's like a whole, like the girls who know know. It's like a whole like world basically and there's like a bunch of different books, but I picked up Ice Planet and it's basically like this girl who gets abducted by aliens and like the alien, like when she's abducted, like she finds out that like the alien has like deemed her like his like mate.
Track 1Yeah. Yeah.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525fucking excited.
Track 1Okay. Yeah. Okay, guys, so you can follow us on Instagram, um, at my sister made me read it podcast. Amy is Amy Protorati. I'm Abby Protorati on Instagram. All that info is down below in our show notes. I've even linked it for you guys. Please write us on the platform you're listening to or listening on. Um, we definitely need some reviews, uh, maybe put your thoughts on this book or on the glow. See if like there was a deeper meaning that we just missed. Um, what you would, oh, we didn't say what we rated it.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Oh,
Track 1I forgot what I rated it. Yeah, I think I rated it like a three, four.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525I think I rated it a three.
Track 1Um, yeah, but that's about it guys.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Oh, yeah. That's it for
Track 1Hopefully we'll be back next week.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525with my, um, my fucking personal life next
Track 1Yep. We'll see if my cat kittens all right all right all right.
squadcaster-703j_1_04-02-2024_104525Okay, bye.
Track 1Bye
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