My Sister Made Me Read It

GRIEF IS A THING WITH FEATHERS Review, Insect Invasions, Ghosts, and Empathy

• Amy and Abby Preteroti • Episode 13

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It’s Amy’s Week!


On this episode of the My Sister Made Me Read It podcast, it’s Amy’s  week to choose what book we read, and she’s decided on the novel GRIEF IS A THING WITH FEATHERS by Max Porter. 


In this episode the sisters catch up with all the things going on in their lives. Abby has an insect problem and maybe a ghost problem in her house. Amy introduces her dogs to a new guy, and they get into all things around animals and empathy differences between men and women.  


Subscribe and Leave us a Review down below! We want to hear from you and what you thought of Grief Is A Thing With Feathers. Give it a rating in the comment section of your rating! 


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Abby



Track 1:

There's flies everywhere in my house I gotta get a venus fly trap I think

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

that you, um, plug in the wall. I have to, I have them.

Track 1:

I have one, I can't find it.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

are my favorite things.

Track 1:

I just, like, there's just so many fucking, like, little flies, because I keep the door open for the dogs.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

isn't

Track 1:

Huh!

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

insulated, I guess, right? Because it's so old. And we were having, this was last summer, we were having

Track 1:

What are

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

so we had the pest control guy come out and like, they were like, We can't even fumigate your house because it would, was gonna hold it inside. Like, it would literally just go back outside. And, um, Jose was showing him the,

Track 1:

you, fucking living in a tent?

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

basically. Jose was showing him the plug in, like, the kind of bugs that we were getting on the plug in. He was like, are not bugs you should be getting on this.

Track 1:

have left immediately.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

great.

Track 1:

on that thought,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

it.

Track 1:

I'mma go.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

so like, we have a really bad like, carpenter bee situation at this house. We had it last, last summer. We got the pest control to come out. He sprayed it. It was fine. So it's summer again and it's happening again. I'm not kidding, like swarms of bees on our front porch I'm like running from the car into the front door because it's like,

Track 1:

What the fuck?

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

so we call the pest control guy like, he was giving me a hard time. He came on a day that it was raining. So like bees aren't going to be outside. You know,

Track 1:

No.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

don't see any and I'm like, okay, but like it's raining like you're the pest control guy You're supposed to know this shit. so then like I was like, I started seeing him on the back porch, too So we were telling him about that. He was like, I guess I'll get my guys out here to come spray and I was like great I would appreciate that and So then he comes to come spray it. He comes himself he comes on a day where I think it was just like cold or something. So there were a lot of them wasn't out or something like that. he was like, I don't know if I'm going to spray. I don't see any and I'm like, they are literally there. Like I am paying you to do this. Why are you giving me such a hard time

Track 1:

Just spray. Yeah.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

already here, you have the utensils to do it, just fucking do it. like, I told Jose, like, you have to deal with him from now on, I can't fucking deal with him. I don't like him. Like, and then, so, then he sprays, and Jose was gone, that's why I was dealing with him in the first place. He can't, Jose comes home, and the guy's like sitting in his car in our driveway. And the guy, Jose's like, oh, are you good, do you need anything, and he's like, no, I'm good. I'm good. like, it was like I just sprayed and like I'm watching this one die, like I'm waiting for it to fall. You know what I'm saying? It was like, great. Like if you need anything, I'll be inside.

Track 1:

What the fuck? If you need anything.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

a weirdo. But

Track 1:

Yeah. I don't know.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

I don't know how I got him out

Track 1:

I don't have any. I've got those fucking anthills, but I don't know what to do about them. I'm just going to let them live their lives outside.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

We have a spider problem. We're just,

Track 1:

Um,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

looking for a new house.

Track 1:

yeah. What? That's kind of crazy.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

a spider on my ceiling in the bedroom the other night. Why?

Track 1:

Well, I've thought about, um, packing a suitcase and leaving in the middle of the night at least 17 times in the last two weeks. Just,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

house?

Track 1:

no, because of my life. Like, I'm just ready to bounce.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

I'm

Track 1:

Like, I'm just trying to bounce.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

here for it.

Track 1:

And not really, but like, sometimes, like, I just like, You know how I just kind of like, things, I like, deal with things, I deal with things, I deal with things, and like, life shits on me, and shits on me, and shits on me, and then I like, am fine until I'm not. And then I have like a explosive breakdown, that was me on Sunday. I was like, I think I'm gonna go. I'm just gonna go. Just throw the dogs in the car. Just like, fucking,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

I

Track 1:

I don't know. I was literally on my way to Burlington Coat Factory trying to find a tent. You know, I'm just gonna go.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

You would not survive in a tent. I tell Jose that all the

Track 1:

I wouldn't outside, I wouldn't literally not outside within the confines of four insulated walls for longer than 12 hours. I wouldn't.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

try camping one time. He's like, we should try it. I'm like, you can have fun. The only type of camping I'm doing is one that has a bathroom.

Track 1:

The only type of camping I'm doing is it. When we're not doing it, I'm not doing it. I would maybe think about doing it if I was like,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

do like glamping.

Track 1:

I just don't like outside.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

either. I'm not a huge fan.

Track 1:

I don't like outside when it's green. I can do outside, like, like desert outside. I could do Arizona outside. I could do,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

bugs. I don't like bugs.

Track 1:

Oh, did you see that? My lights just flickered maybe there's a poltergeist come and take me oh my god

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Go

Track 1:

What?

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

I'll tell you my story in a

Track 1:

Bro, you know, I've been like in my grave the past week like so fucking sick So my friend Chloe tells me today cuz I've been dying Like just so fucking sick. I like feel a little bit better today, but We were out at brunch on Sunday, and I was like sneezing and like coughing and just going through it and she was like, you know, um, I Heard that when you get sick right after the solar eclipse, it means your ancestors are cleansing all the demons of

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

lovely.

Track 1:

I Was like bitch. Well, I must have had a lot of them because I got sick literally the day after this

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Oh

Track 1:

eclipse So all the demons are just getting out of my body and maybe that's what's happening

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

cleansing thing.

Track 1:

what my problem has been. I've been saging every single night. I sleep with Palo Santo next to my bed. Palo Santo. It's the, like a smudge stick for good energy. Yeah. Anyways,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

No, I thought you're going in the direction of like spirits and ghosts because I feel like there's a spirit in this house and we're like on good terms but I feel like I might have pissed it off because Because I was standing, I was busy the other day so I was like doing all this house stuff and was We got one of those magnetic like calendars for the refrigerator so I can like plan out our meals for the week. I just did that and I was standing there and on the top of our refrigerator, we have like Powerades cause Jose likes to drink Powerades. And I'm standing there like just thinking through things and I kid you not, these powerades fucking like ricochet towards my head. I was like, what the hell? Jose was like, Jose, like they fell on the floor. So Jose heard like a bang and he was like, what happened? Are you good? And I was like, Yeah, but that was just like really weird like what happened and I like told him and I was like That was really weird. Like it didn't like fault like slip and fall it literally like like leaped at my head

Track 1:

you guys need to get like those cameras.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

scared

Track 1:

Like, you know how we you see like on tiktok you could like see activity like that Why that's so cool

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

see something I'm still in this house I'm still stuck in this house until I find a new one

Track 1:

Dude what if you have a ghost in your house?

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

I don't think we do. I speak to it sometimes because, like, I don't, you know, the whole, like, it's just bad electricity. I, like, have been saying that our electricity is just bad, but now I'm thinking it might just be a ghost. Because, in the kitchen, our lights flicker all the fucking time. And sometimes I'll just be like, can you not, like, I need the lights. like, it'll stop.

Track 1:

Bitch what?

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

get pissed off and like turn them off and then I'll cook in the dark. But like we're cool like if there are like I'm we're cool

Track 1:

I'm, sorry I

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

much for this

Track 1:

can't believe i've never heard this from you before

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

I've just after the power raid thing I just always thought it was bad electricity after the power raid thing. I'm like been thinking about it

Track 1:

It's just yeeted power right at your head Oh my god,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

did I do? Like, I didn't piss you off. I don't know. Yeah.

Track 1:

I am obsessed

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

a little nervous.

Track 1:

You have to give us updates.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

There's

Track 1:

Wow. You have a haunted house.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

I just, I don't know. Maybe something will happen. I don't know. But

Track 1:

You should say to your house that might piss it off even more.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

we're good right now.

Track 1:

Okay. You guys are on good terms. Okay, good. My lights are flickering now. Now I'm kind of getting freaked the fuck out. I think, why are my lights flickering? They've never flickered before. Oh man.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

change the subject.

Track 1:

I'm telling you, these demons are coming out of my body.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

That's

Track 1:

Something happened. Honestly, I wouldn't fight them. If they wanted to take me. I really wouldn't. I would not fight you. Why is there, what the fuck? Yo, I live in the weirdest part of town. I swear to God.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

There's a fly that is flying back

Track 1:

I just I'm telling you.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Why is your neighborhood

Track 1:

I don't know what's going on. I live in the weirdest part of fucking town. Like my Charlotte is so, like, great, but like, it's a city and it's very gentrified. So like, I'm in a gentrified part of town and, and they're everywhere, bro. I don't know what to do. Um, like I have a beautiful house across the street. My house is beautiful, renovated, new. The one across the street to my left is beautiful, big, new. And then the one directly across the street from me is a meth house. I'm convinced there's 16 cars

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Solid.

Track 1:

times. Like, and there's people just like hanging out outside. Like when TVs one time, he was like, what are the, uh, what is that like a lawn company over there? And I said he thought there were Mexicans That like live across the street with like a lawn company and I said no those are I was like no That's a meth house. I think that's a crack house

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

That's like, you know, we're looking for a house and stuff and so like we've, God, we've been touring so many different houses. And my one thing is like, I don't care if I get like a dated house that needs renovation. I don't care. The one thing is like the location has to be safe and I have to feel like we're good. Like we can take a walk.

Track 1:

I feel safe. Like the only thing that like i'm like, oh, I don't know if i'm safe as if the meth lab explodes But the people working in the meth lab so nice

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Hard

Track 1:

employee is 10 out of 10. Holy shit, bro.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

that's,

Track 1:

I forgot I have a fucking meeting in 15 minutes. We're gonna have to pause this in 15 minutes and restart, um, or and get back to it. Um, that's my only concern for safety is if it explodes. Because they're so nice. They wave at me super nice. My neighbor next directly next door is like an old it's like a Man, but like an old lady with dementia and she waves at me like i'm like her favorite neighbor every day Like so people are so fucking nice. But yesterday I come home from the gym, right? And I pull into down my street and there's just like six cop cars Like just parked like in front of my fucking house And I like pulled and they're all outside And I pull into my driveway And I just like get out of my car and they're like just look at me and i'm like

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Hi!

Track 1:

And no one said anything to me so I just went in my house and just like went on with my day But i'm like what the fuck is going on? Yeah, I don't know but I just saw like a lady like just walk out like in her fucking underwear just Going down the street. Oh, there she goes Got pants on now.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Too much go go pants.

Track 1:

Yeah. I don't know, man.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

we went

Track 1:

It's weird out here.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

went and did a few houses this weekend, and this is the second house that we went to, and it's so funny because, like, the listings that you look at vastly different from what the actual place looks like. you can think this place looks great and then you go there and it's literally a shithouse. So we show up at

Track 1:

Yeah.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

like, oh, it's definitely gonna need renovations, but it's nice, whatever. We walk up to the front door and there is a bird's nest on the floor and a dead baby bird.

Track 1:

No. Immediately, no. I'm leaving.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

said, that's a dead baby bird. And Jose like knows, like every time we see like, Roadkill or like a dog on the side of the road like all those things. He's like don't look don't look he was like

Track 1:

That's like a badass omen.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

That's so that's exactly what I said. I said, this is a bad omen We can't buy this house like before we even walked into it. And so then we walk in and this house Is just a shit house like half of the flooring has been ripped up Like there's not even flooring in half the house And so we're like walking around and i'm like looking at jose like why are we wasting our time? We're not buying this house And then we go, all three of us, me and Jose and our realtor, walk into the main bathroom, the main bedroom, it's on the first floor, and then I hear something, like I hear like water running upstairs. And I automatically start hitting Jose like there's a squatter, like we need to get the fuck out of here.

Track 1:

Have you seen those videos on TikTok?

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

how I know about it. So I'm like,

Track 1:

Oh my God.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

And he's like, what, what? And then it's like, it's like, okay, well let's just keep walking around. keep walking around and like, I'm like, I'm not go every time we go in a basement, I'm like, you're going first. Every time we go upstairs, I'm like, you're going first.

Track 1:

I want to hit there's a fly that just landed on my fucking screen. I want to whack the shit out of it, but I don't know what to do with it. I

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

you have

Track 1:

just I'm gross. Okay, continue. Should I put out like a cup of sugar water, maybe?

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

say. Yeah. Do it later. Just hit it.

Track 1:

Okay, continue. I'm scared. Okay.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

No, so then we go upstairs, and I'm like, someone's gonna be up here, I just know it. then we go upstairs, and it is creepiest thing I've ever seen. Like, you walk upstairs, and it's just one bedroom, and then you step up, and it's a bathroom. And then right in front of you is like a wall, and there's these doors that kind of Just are old and creepy and they're little and then we open them and it's like the attic and like where the furnace is at it's like hot as like you open it and it's like you feel like you're entering hell Like it was that hot like I was like, nope, and I turned around I

Track 1:

Sorry.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

around God this is a shit show Oh my god

Track 1:

That was your ghost. It was like, yo, got you.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Um, for those of you listening, I did a thumbs up apparently and a thumbs up icon came up. But anyways, so then they open these furnace doors and I'm like, fuck it, I'm out. So I like dip, I turn around and walk right back downstairs. I'm like, I'm not dealing with this shit. I'm telling you. Oh my God.

Track 1:

What the fuck is happening? You know what? That just reminded me of though is so fucking funny. Sometimes, like when I listen back, not sometimes, every time I fucking listen to these episodes, like, I'm just like, what the fuck? Like, I am always like, Like I'll say shit and then I'll listen back and I'll be like, that's literally not true. I don't remember what the fuck I said. I don't remember what the fuck I said. I think we were, I think it was about like when I was talking about the Lord series and I, I kept like saying something and I'm like, that's literally not, why are you like, I like got like the order wrong or something and it was freaking me out and then like, I forget sometimes when we're talking. Cause like when me and you were just, it kind of just feels like we're on the phone right now. Like I forget that we're kind of recording and we're just having our own conversation. And I was listening back and we were talking about, um, like the books that we're reading and we're like literally just in our own world and you're like, yes, I got this book and you're like showing me, but we never said the book title,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

thing. I think that was last week. I was like, fuck, I should have said the name.

Track 1:

never said the book. You're like, I got this book. And I'm like, Oh my God, that one is. Yeah, that's so good. And this book. And like, we never said the book name.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Yeah, I realize that.

Track 1:

Oh God. Anyways. Why did I bring that up? Continue.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

I don't know. I mean, there wasn't a squatter, but there was like a furnace from hell. And so I was like, we can't buy this house, and we left.

Track 1:

That was like, I was watching, I saw this video of like that lady showing the apartment to that couple and she walked

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

And she was like, there's a person in the

Track 1:

into the closet, walked into the closet and was like, Oh,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Well, have you heard how like, apparently,

Track 1:

she's like, there's a person in there,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

don't know if it's like in California, cause I have never heard about it being in Georgia, but like, how squatters have like, rights? Have you been hearing about this?

Track 1:

please know

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

apparently, People are like, go on vacation and squatters have been going into their house, and so they come home and people are in their home, and like, they can't just kick them out of their home.

Track 1:

there's no way

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

have not done much research on this, I literally just heard this podcast talking

Track 1:

if I go on vacation and someone is in my home.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

to like, figure out how to get them out and change the locks, something, so they

Track 1:

I'm shooting, I'm shooting them.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

you pay the fucking mortgage, it's your house.

Track 1:

I'm gonna start just doing that. I'm gonna go to California and just be like squatters, right? Sorry, my dude, this is my house too. Now please. No, that's wild.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

I'm scared every time I go look at a house that someone's gonna be in it. Or even

Track 1:

I'm happy that I,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

we went to another house, and I just don't, I mean I get it, but I just don't like doing it. We went to a house and it was like, the people still lived there, so all of their shit was everywhere.

Track 1:

I hate that. I hate that. I've done that a few times too.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

so we were walking through this house, And Jose at one point wouldn't walk into a bedroom. Like he walked into all the other ones but stopped and I was like, what are you doing? And then I like walked into the bedroom and didn't think anything of it. And we're driving home later that day and it came up somehow. And he was like, you know why I didn't walk in that bedroom, right? And I was like, no, like, I was like, I thought you just didn't want to like, like, it was nicely vacuumed. Like, I didn't think you wanted to like mess it up. And he was like, no, I saw that there was a nanny cam. And I didn't want them to like be recording us. And I was like, yeah,

Track 1:

like, go ahead wife, you walk in there.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

me walk into it. I'm like, hi

Track 1:

like,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

I was like, oh,

Track 1:

you go babe, go, you figure it out. You check it out, that's funny as shit.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

under the idea that he's undocumented.

Track 1:

Yeah, he's like, I don't know, nope. Not for me.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

guys,

Track 1:

No surveillance. He's, Bro, Abby, I'm fucking dead. Did I ever send you the video? I don't remember if I ever told you about this video. I, when I tell you, I don't think in my whole 28 years of life, I've ever laughed harder at a fucking video and I can't let it go. And like everyone around me is like, what the fuck is wrong with you? And I'm like, I can't let this video go. It's the, it's the best thing I've ever seen in my life. So, okay. So, you know, the comedians, the, um, two bears, one cave, I think is what they're called. Um,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Mmhmm.

Track 1:

so it's them and the bigger one and not not Tom Seguera the other one I forget Burt Kreischer, maybe

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Burt.

Track 1:

Okay, it's him telling the story to Tom Seguera speaking of Tom Seguera. He was just at the Spectrum Center this weekend anyways He's telling Tom Seguera's story

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Is this when the wife calls?

Track 1:

No,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Oh, okay.

Track 1:

no, so he's telling him a story about when they went on vacation right And he's like, yeah, we went on vacation and we're jet skiing. So it's like this attraction basically where they could get on like these jet skis. And, um, this guy, he's saying that this guy in the group is getting on this jet ski and he speaks no English. Like, this man, like, does not speak any fucking English, okay? Have you seen this?

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Yeah, but

Track 1:

Bro, he, like, doesn't speak any fucking English. And he gets on the jet ski, and the guy is, like, telling him, like, the tour guide is, like, Whatever you do, do not, like, I don't remember, like, do not do this one thing. And he's, like, Okay! And then he He like, does exactly what he wasn't supposed to do. And like, runs right into the fucking tree. And like, falls off the jet ski. And like, dislocates his fucking shoulder. And like, everyone's like, oh my god. And then his girlfriend just looks at him and goes, He no can a swim. He no can a swim. And he's just, And he's just fucking dying. And then like, he was fine. He just like dislocated his shoulder. Like, but this poor fucking man can't speak any English and can't swim. And he's like drowning. And the girlfriend's just so unphased. She's like, you know, can I swim?

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Like, Jose's

Track 1:

like,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

That's

Track 1:

you know, can I swim? Cause we just think it's the funniest shit. It's the funniest fucking shit.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Who's it cracks me up. Cause like every time we go to Florida, he's like, I want to go on a boat. I want to do this. And I'm like, babe, you can't even swim. Like what if something happens? Like,

Track 1:

He don't get to swim. Yeah,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

And

Track 1:

probably.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

on a boat with his whole family, like his whole intimate family. I was sitting there. And then I had this

Track 1:

Um, I think you meant to say I think you meant to say immediate.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

we're all very close.

Track 1:

We're all very, very close. You just That reminds me of when Lala on Vanderpump, she said, um, She said one time in her confessional, she was like, I'm just like ready to just, um, like move on and like, just like spread my legs. And they were like, I think you meant to say spread your wings. And she's like, what did I say? And they were like legs. And she was like, Oh my God. Yeah. His intimate family. And I, his immediate family, you were on a boat.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

We're on a boat. in the middle of the ocean and I had this realization of like if we go down all you guys are Fucked and I can't help all of you guys at the same time

Track 1:

So, who are you choosing? Your husband?

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

obviously Of

Track 1:

Y'all gots to go.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

course they do.

Track 1:

Are you sleepy?

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

I'm so sleepy today. a sleepy girl. Um, I know we wouldn't need to get into this book, but I guess we should still make an announcement. That

Track 1:

About what?

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

That my cat. no, nothing like that.

Track 1:

Oh my god. I was like, what the fuck are you about to say?

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

That my cat did have kittens.

Track 1:

The cat had kittens.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

The cat had kittens. underneath my porch. It was like weird because came up to have dinner one night and I was like giving her love like I always do. And she was bleeding and I was like, Like she's gonna have her babies and then I was just I was worried that like are they supposed to bleed like I had no Idea, so that was like researching it and

Track 1:

Yeah.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

don't get Involved Involved and I was like Jose. I can't just ignore if something's wrong like so I let her do her thing woke up the next morning. She had five kittens Which is a lot, but

Track 1:

That is a lot.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

underneath my porch. She was fine I checked on all the babies and then the next day one had passed, which is like the worst thing in the world. So I had to bury, I was like, Jose was like, just leave it. I was like, I'm not just going to leave it.

Track 1:

No.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

No. I got to bury it. So struggled digging a hole, finally got a hole dug and buried it. But

Track 1:

That's like when my guinea pig died.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Yeah. What was her name?

Track 1:

Pearl. I put her in a to go box.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

said Pam. Well, so like I had a, put her, she was like obviously where the other kittens were. So like I removed the kittens, the live kittens, and then I was like, I just put her in like a, to go, like a plastic container. And I was like, I don't want to bury a plastic container the ground because like that's bad for the environment. So I had her in there until I got the hole, and then I just kind of like put her in the hole without the plastic container. But, I did the I know I did the right thing. was a

Track 1:

You definitely did. Yeah, that is very traumatizing. You definitely did the right thing, though.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

yeah. But

Track 1:

How was she when you moved them? Did you move the babies into

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

so, I had like a cardboard box and like a blanket and I moved them into that so I can kind of like move them around. Cause then I was like, I don't like where they're at, they're in dirt. And so she like would not go up to them unless they were back in that exact spot that she gave birth to them in.

Track 1:

Wow.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

tried to get her to like come different places, she wouldn't do it. So then I put them back and she like went back and like fed them and stuff.

Track 1:

at least you got to touch them and like hold them a little.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Yeah, so like when I feed her in the morning and at night, be like, come on mama, like come eat and then she'll come, she'll leave her babies to come eat and then I'll walk down where she

Track 1:

And see them.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

like the perfect place because it's underneath our porch, but we have like a little like gate that opens up on the side of the porch that we can walk underneath the porch if we need to. And so that's where she had them. So I've been opening the gate and like every time she's eating, she'll let me go check on the babies. make sure they're like being fed and stuff. So That's what I've been doing and they're they're fine like they're chunking up a little bit their eyes

Track 1:

Yeah.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

they're not even like a week old now, but

Track 1:

So cute. That's so funny cause Mel's cat had her babies the exact same night yours did. And Mel FaceTimed me, so she had her So So, Mel found a stray cat was on her balcony and started feeding it and, um, was like, I don't know what to do. And then she realized, she's like, I think this cat is pregnant. So she co horsed her into the house and has been keeping her in the bathroom. Um. Because she already has two cats in her apartment. So she's kept them all separated. She took her to the vet She didn't have any of like the diseases that cats can have so like she was healthy, but she was so pregnant so they're Like she took her to the vet. I mean it sounds really fucking sad, but Like stray cats like the best thing to do would have been to like have like a little kitty abortion

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

yeah,

Track 1:

So like that's what she went to go do and they were like No, we're not doing that like these she's like about to give birth

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

yeah, it's like too far along

Track 1:

So and I don't even know if that's necessarily the case because I think they can still do it but for some reason they didn't and

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

they like, it's like they do it at the same time that they do the

Track 1:

Like a spay Yeah, I Don't know So she's just been chilling in the bathroom and she faced on me. I don't know This morning that yours had the babies and she was like, I'm freaking out. She had these kittens, but she had them in the fucking litter box. So they were like covered, like matted with litter. And she like called like the vet and the vet was like, that's fine. And she was like, I don't think this is fine. Like something's wrong. So she called another vet and the other vet was like, you've got to get the, that cat out of the litter box. Like ASAP. Cause like, she's licking them. She's like going to be eating the litter. They could suffocate. So, but when I was on FaceTime with her, she had only had three kittens and she ended up having five. So she was like doing all this like research, like trying to figure out like. Does the placenta come first because

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

I

Track 1:

I was on the phone with her and like, she was like, Oh my God, I think she's having one. Oh my God. And like, she was like showing me and I'm like, Oh my God. And like, her stomach is like contracting. Yeah, it was fucking crazy. And then she just like, she was like, Oh, and like, we're like watching it and like a placenta just plops out of this

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Oh,

Track 1:

of the JJ and just was like a lot.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

It

Track 1:

She was like, Amy, she was like, I think I have to call out. I don't think it's fine.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

This is too dramatizing, it

Track 1:

She was like, I can't, she was like, I don't think I can. And I was like, it's totally fine, dude. Like, don't even worry about it.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Yeah, it's so stressful, but it's just like,

Track 1:

But Abby, they're the fucking cutest. Like, I'm like, I'm going to go see them. They're so fucking cute. She's absolutely obsessed. She's like already having a hard time, like having to let them go. She like sends me pictures every day. Last night they were holding hands. Two of like the little babies had like their hands together. It's the cutest fucking thing.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

has a cat that, like, it sounds like the cat lets her come up to the babies

Track 1:

Yes, she's gained so much trust with this cat.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

can't go near the babies yet.

Track 1:

Abby, look at the,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

them.

Track 1:

you see?

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Yeah. my

Track 1:

They're so cute and they're so fluffy. Um, anyways, but yeah, these kittens are so fucking cute.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

see, this is where they're at

Track 1:

Yours look big.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

They've,

Track 1:

so cute.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

up. There's one cat that has the exact same markings as Luna.

Track 1:

Do you want to keep one?

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Um, maybe a kitten, but like, I haven't really thought of it yet because Jose doesn't want to keep going. Jose's like Is kind of traumatized because of our history with cats remember madison had those cats and know, he tried to take one that had a lot of problems and like he feels like he failed that cat And so I

Track 1:

Yeah.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

issues with that. So he doesn't to be involved with these kittens and I respect that so I haven't really been telling him anything but

Track 1:

Yeah,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Maybe one day, but I don't know

Track 1:

I want to keep one of these cats so bad, but like I literally can't like and my least Like I'm not really worried about the dogs I mean I am a little bit cuz Drax is very reactive and I'm scared like and he's like can be kind of aggressive. So I Would be a little bit worried about him maybe like attacking it But I'm more worried about Like I have my doors open all the time. So I don't think I can do that. And this morning, so I, there's stray cats all around my fucking house, like in this neighborhood. And this morning the dogs are going fucking nuts, nuts. And I wake up and I like look out my bedroom window and there's a cat in the backyard just like walking around and Drex is losing his goddamn mind, like was losing his fucking mind. I'm like, shit, I can't let these dogs outside until that cat's gone. Cause they will tear it to shreds.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

That was

Track 1:

Like, yeah.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

to Atlanta for an appointment yesterday, and I fed the cats, checked on the kittens before I left, and I come home and there was like, um, a note on my door. Like a, like a folded up note on my door. I'm like, what the hell? So I pull it, and I'm reading it, and my neighbor wrote me with this note, because we don't, I'm gonna have phone numbers, and um, talking about the mama cat. Went into her backyard and they have two dogs And the dogs got a hold of it and she was scared that it was her and wanted me to like She tried to check on it, but like it wouldn't go up to her If I could check on them, she knew they just had like kittens and all that thing and

Track 1:

Oh.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

like fuck like if this cat's her she was like i'll pay for the vet bills if something's wrong

Track 1:

Oh, how nice.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

And like thank god the mom's fine. Like the cat's fine and then I've rubbed her down. She's fine. And when I was at yoga yesterday, Jose said she came over and was like, did you guys get my note? I just want to make sure. And Jose was like, yeah, she's fine. She was eating like whatever. And Jose was telling me that she tried to break up the fight and she got like, screw the cat, like scratched her all down her arm. And I was like, Oh God, I feel so bad. Like

Track 1:

Dude It's so funny. Like I think about like, do you know what kind of dog she has?

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

She has? a beagle type dog and

Track 1:

Not a pico

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

they have like a I don't know. They're like beagle mixes.

Track 1:

Weird

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Yeah.

Track 1:

so funny like My dog, I obviously love my dogs so much and they're perfect to me but like I don't have those kind of pitbulls that are like so cuddly and like Sweet like my dogs are crackheads

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Yeah.

Track 1:

Like you should have seen sunshine this morning. She this bitch was literally like she gets the zoomies so crazy She like will hurt herself, bro like It's like her body moves faster She is a crackhead dude, I don't know what the fuck i'm like, do you have rabies like you're like

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

ha!

Track 1:

She like i'm giving them baths today because they are literally A different color because they like roll in this dirt so much And like this morning she had the zoomies so bad abby. I was sitting on the porch And her and like drax just kind of like watches her like this It's like And all of a sudden this literally came out of fucking nowhere. Like she was on one side of the yard and he was just standing, just minding his goddamn business. And I just see her just like flying and she just bodied the fuck out of Drax, like knocked his ass almost over. Like she just like, like it was like a fucking suicide mission. This dog just, Just like a fucking missile right into his side.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Yeah.

Track 1:

try to jump over him. Nothing just knocked the fuck out of him. And he was like, what the fuck? I was like, what is happening? And then she like, is it doing this new thing now? It's really cute. But like when she gets the zoomies, she just like zoom, zoom, zoom stops, rolls over.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Crazy.

Track 1:

Yeah, but they'll literally eat any other living animal like they're crackheads.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Yeah.

Track 1:

They're not like the friendly, cuddly, like you see like those pit bulls that like see birds and they like put like their noses on the birds. No, could never be my dogs. That's a snack. Yeah.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Because. Like, that's the one thing I struggle with Luna. She's never been socialized with any other animals, so it's so hard. Like, I open the door to feed the cats and they're on my porch and Luna's hissing at them. And I'm like, they're not doing anything. You're fine.

Track 1:

Yeah.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

cats don't like dogs either, so.

Track 1:

Yeah. We have very, um, I think the friendliest animal out of all three of ours Who do you think?

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

I would,

Track 1:

I mean, Sunny is very friendly, but she doesn't like men.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

to like other, like the people is not an issue. It's to like other animals.

Track 1:

for mine it's people. Drax don't like people. Drax will bite people.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Winston, I don't know Holly with other animals though, that's the only thing. But I probably, like

Track 1:

I think Holly.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Amanda would bring Winston to mom's house when we still lived at home. And like he was so inquisitive about Luna, like he did not give two

Track 1:

Yeah, but like, like, Drax and Winston have snapped at each other, but I think

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

true.

Track 1:

so because of Drax. I don't know. But also like I think Winston snaps at dogs a little bit. I think Holly's the friendliest.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

think Holly just doesn't give a shit about any other animals. She just wants attention from people.

Track 1:

Yeah, I think she's the friendliest. I love that dog so much.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Not

Track 1:

She's so fucking cute. I think like, so did I tell you when my man friend from last week, which is another story,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Yeah.

Track 1:

came to the house and met the dogs?

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

No.

Track 1:

Okay, so I had told him, I said, so He also has three pit bulls. So he like, it's like nose dogs. And I told him I was like, Drax is my very strict boundary dog. Like he, You know, he'll bite, like, he's kind of like the one I have to watch. And I was like, Sonny's so friendly, but she's scared of men.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Mm

Track 1:

Like she just doesn't like men. So I don't know how this is going to go

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

So,

Track 1:

he,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Yeah. Yeah.

Track 1:

So my big a hundred pound dog bites people and the small one doesn't like men. So, and you are both a person and a man, so this is going to go really well. So I kept them behind their gate. And like Drax is funny because he is very friendly. Like I say, he bites, but he, he is very friendly, but he just is very like number one. He's very like my mom, my mom, like very possessive over me. And he is just like reactive. Like if he doesn't like something, he'll just be like, bitch, like shit like that. Like he's not going to attack somebody out of like pure aggression, but he'll snip. But I have noticed with Drax, I think he appreciates and likes the presence of a man. Yeah. Because he doesn't have it. So like when I do have men around he like is like fucking thank god And he's like like when courtney was at the house doing my tvs He was like so excited that there was like a man in the house Um anyways, so I had them behind the gate when he came in Abby drax is just chilling. He's like all excited and like wanting to like be pet and shit You know how he gets kind of when like people are are around like he's like happy and sunshine On two legs, this bitch stands on two fucking legs, just stands like this and is like, Like screaming at him like this bitch turned into a skinwalker, bro I was like what? I'm like sonny. It's fine. And he was like you told me to worry about him I'm scared of that thing. Like why does she look like that? I was like, I don't know why she looks like that, bro. Like she's literally standing on two legs. Her arms are just like up like this, like a T Rex. And she's just like fucking screaming at this man. I'm like, I'm scared. I don't know what the fuck she's doing. She's literally,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

she mad at you? What do you hope? You

Track 1:

yeah. I'm like, I told you she don't like men. She just, she's never acted like that with a man. Well, well, she's never acted like that with any of the girls, obviously. Like she's loves the girls, but like any man, like when she first

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

went, like with Jose, she wasn't that way with

Track 1:

No, but yeah, but you were also there. I don't know. She likes women. She's just so scared of men, which makes me so sad, but like, I get it.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Yeah.

Track 1:

But like, she was like that too. Not like that. Like she turned into a different species. I don't know what the fuck that was.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

You're like, we should go back out. You can't stay here.

Track 1:

I don't know what the fuck she was doing. It was funny though. Um, but when she met my ex for the first time, It was like right when like I had first got her and she was still really scared even of me a little bit like it was Within like the first three days of me adopting her and she was just skittish like not know didn't know what's going on But had like kind of bonded with me um, and When he came into the house She because I knew that she didn't like men. So I was weary but when she came into the house she Literally jumped in front of me You And just like stood her ground, but she like stood like 10 toes against this man stood right in between my legs and was barking But she was shaking like a fucking leaf And like I just remember like looking at him and just started crying and I was like She's so scared, but she's like standing for her mama. I was like, oh, but you know when she met this other guy She was like straight skin walker I was like what the fuck It was the strangest thing Like standing up like a bear

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Well at least you know if there's an intruder you got They

Track 1:

she's the scary one. I mean like Drax looks scarier, obviously, but Sunshine will rip your goddamn throat out.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

like we're just fucked because Like, Luna's scared of everything, she'll just go and hide. We just don't have anything. I'm like, we need a dog to like, alert us when someone

Track 1:

you know how people are, people are like, yeah, like my scary guard dog, like after like, like, like I've seen like videos, like I saw one yesterday, it was like, um, my dog just sitting while like my house gets robbed after he gave him kisses for coming in. I'm like, my dog, not my dogs, my dogs will rip your jugular out. If you come into this house Remember when sunshine remember at my old house when um, I don't know if I ever told you that's when the Fucking male ups lady came up to the door and sunny Literally busted the window out

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

No.

Track 1:

dude I had to run after this lady and be like i'm so fucking sorry like she like ran from my house because she Sunny literally tried to get to her so bad. She busted the whole fucking screen out the window You

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Yeah, I'd shit my

Track 1:

Like the screen was like literally in the yard. I'm like, I'm so sorry. Like my dog is a psychopath. I have no idea what is wrong with them. Yeah. There went my security deposit to fix the fucking screen in the window.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

kidding. Alright, you wanna talk

Track 1:

Anyways, did you read this book?

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

I did. I read it, I finished it last night actually. Interesting.

Track 1:

Yeah, it was not what I thought it was going to be at all.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

I actually should have looked into the second meaning of it, because I forgot. I didn't really understand.

Track 1:

I didn't understand it at all.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

poems are never, have never been my strong suit. Like,

Track 1:

Me neither. I didn't know it was a poem book.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

I told you it's a narrative poem book.

Track 1:

says a novel on it.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Oh, I bought the Kindle version. Does it say novel?

Track 1:

It says grief is the thing with feathers, a novel.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

I guess. the definition of a novel though? It's a,

Track 1:

I don't know,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

poem, like it, and it's in the point of view of three different people. It's in the point of view of the dad, the two sons who are twins, and then a thing called the crow.

Track 1:

which I think just symbolizes his grief.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

I don't think it's, I like, I did until like towards the end, it was talking, the crow was talking about how like, Like, you still grieve, but, um, my time to leave. I don't think it's grief, I think it's the, um, what was I thinking last night? Like the um, like the active dealing with, like the changing of like your life, I guess.

Track 1:

Yeah, he kind of was like a, um,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

how you have like a grief counselor to kind of like push you into like, this was your life and now we're gonna figure out a new life for you. It felt like that.

Track 1:

or like the grim reaper,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

I didn't think it was the Grim Reaper. I always,

Track 1:

like guiding you.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

read it, I thought it was gonna be the mom.

Track 1:

No, it was not.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

No, it wasn't.

Track 1:

Yeah, I liked the third. So it's, it's in, it's broken down into three parts. I liked, I enjoyed the third part more

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Yeah, same.

Track 1:

at the very end. I And I was like, I don't know, like towards the end I was like, I don't have anything to say about this book. Like I like it, I guess, but it didn't really feel like even like a book to me.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

I was just confused. Did, did I like interpret this wrong or did, was it like, especially towards the end, was it like, chronological like it felt like it was going back and forth like he was like the kids were an adult and then they

Track 1:

I don't know. I felt like it was everywhere.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

then they boys like ran away And then it was talking about until they started like growing beards and I was like, okay Well, I thought they were younger than that

Track 1:

I don't know, dude.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

That's I'm saying I think there needs to be some research on it

Track 1:

Yeah, I'm sure there's like a lot more meaning to it than we think, but like I just did not have the energy to look into it like that. But I did, towards the end, what?

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Nothing.

Track 1:

Towards the end, I was like, okay, I don't really have much to say about this book, so, like, I should probably, like, figure out, like, what's my favorite poem out of this book.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Okay.

Track 1:

Did you have one that stood out to you? I did.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Um, I highlighted something, so yeah, go ahead.

Track 1:

I liked, on page 92, It's the Dad's Perspective. This was when I finally, when I started to be like, aww. I don't know. Like that. Okay, I'm gonna read it. It says, this is dad, it says, She had the flu, it was unusual for her to be ill. The boys were tiny, and it had snowed, and she couldn't bear us rampaging about the house, so we got dressed and went sledding in the park. We were pathetic without her. The boys didn't know where their hats were, couldn't get their joined mittens through their puffer jackets, didn't want to see other boys, bigger boys, sledding on the hill. I was hopeless. I took them out without wellies, so before we'd even got down to the road, their little toes were aching. They both winged and we all felt, the three of us, That without her, things didn't work as they should. They pitted me. I felt acutely embarrassed that my brilliance as a father had been exposed as wholly reliant upon her. Perhaps if I'd known it was a dress rehearsal for the rest of our lives, I would have said, Buck up, you little turds, or help me. Or take me, take me instead, please.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Yeah, I remember that one. That one was sad.

Track 1:

That's so sad.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

only

Track 1:

where I was like, damn.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

The only place that I highlighted was like on page five. It was part of the dad's thing. It was like a longer one. But um, it's talking about after she died and it says the doorbell rang and I braced myself for more kindness another lasagna Some books a cuddle little potted ready meals for the boys. Of course I was becoming expert in the behavior of or witting grievers. Being at the epicenter grants a curiosity anthropological awareness of everybody else. The overwhelms, the effectively lackadaisicals, the nothing so fars, the overstayers, and the new best friends of hers, of mine, of the boys. The people I still have no fucking idea who they were.

Track 1:

Yeah.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

I thought that was relatable.

Track 1:

Very relatable.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

And I think that's what this book does. Like, it has, like, some, like, one liners or it has little

Track 1:

Yeah.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

super relatable if you've been through this type of experience. But, like, like if someone's grieving, I wouldn't be like, here, pick up this book. This book is gonna be something that you can relate to. Like, I think this is something that, like,

Track 1:

Like you read like later.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

yeah. That's what I was kind of, like, curious of, of like, what kind of audience the author was wanting to get out, out of it. Excuse me.

Track 1:

Yeah, it is interesting. And like looking at it as a whole, like going back to that first few pages, like you just read, like it does flow kind of well. I mean it starts with like four to five days after she dies and then it kind of goes into like the crow coming and like helping him like through the grief and then towards the end he like, you know, he, they talk about how dad like starts like dating again. And like kind of that experience, like his first time with somebody else, like, I don't know.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

I think it's just like, a read. I don't think

Track 1:

Yeah. It was what it was, it is what it is, it be what it be, you know.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, Yeah, I, I'm sorry. I don't have any more like comments on it, but there wasn't like a lot of comments to be had, I think.

Track 1:

Not really. You know what I heard the other day that I thought was really interesting?

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Hmm. Mm

Track 1:

I heard, so you know how like people say that like men are more logical than women? I heard someone say, That that's not true that women just have more empathy. So women are logical, but we also like, we're just as equally logical, but we also think about other people more than men do. So it comes off as we're more empathetic because. Like a logical decision, but we're also empathetic. So we think about how it's going to affect another person. Men are more logical, but they have no fucking empathy. So they only do whatever they think is like, this is logical without thinking about the other person. And I'm like, that's so fucking true. Men aren't more logical than us. They just literally have no empathy for anybody.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

No. I think, yeah, and I think that's how we've, like, society's been built and like, have been bred that way, basically.

Track 1:

Yeah. Which is sad. And I, that's not true. I don't speak in absolutes. Like I know, I know, okay. I know one man who has empathy, two men. I think your husband has a lot of empathy.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Yeah.

Track 1:

but that's pretty much it.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

still fight about it. though, because there are there is that I don't know if this is normal marriages, but like there is that like I have a I would even say like i'm more empathetic than most people and I have a lot of

Track 1:

You are.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

towards different things and like this whole cat situation it just you know, it brings up those conversations of like You know, he's not that way at all and i'm like having to do everything for these cats, you know

Track 1:

He is that way though. Your husband is very empathetic, but I know what you mean. That's like, like with like these cats that like Mel is dealing with, like John just does not understand. He's like, what the fuck is wrong with you guys? And I'm like, nothing is, what do you mean what's wrong with us? Cause Mel is also very close to John. And so like the three of us, I've been like, just like talking about these cats and I was on the phone with her the other day with him and, um, Mel was like, I just want to keep one. I'm like, I want to fucking keep one too, dude. Like I really do. And John's just like, no. Absolutely not. Like why did you even take this cat in in the first place? Like you should have just left it alone and we're like, what do you mean? Like we're not just leaving the cat on the fucking sidewalk. I was, and I, and Mel was like, maybe I should have. And I'm like, no, you shouldn't have. Like it would, those cats would have fucking died. And like, same like for you, like if like you weren't taking care of them, like those cats would be fucking dead.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Yeah.

Track 1:

But men just don't get it.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Yeah, it's just a, you know, it's just a way, a different way of thinking. I think Jose too, like it's, he doesn't even want to name the cats because he knows if he names the cats, he's going to be very much attached and then we're going to have more issues. I think it's a way too of him just protecting all of that. But definitely see like. Yeah, I think, I think that's why I've always struggled I guess with other people or like men in general because it's totally relatable like everything I do in my life like I'm always thinking of how that's affecting other people Especially if it's like in a one on one type of interaction and like I think many people don't think about those things

Track 1:

No, I have to say I am and I think you would agree with this like I've gained more empathy as I've aged but and this has been a fault of mine and a main point in my friendships and relationships is like I have to, and not that I don't think about other people, cause I do, I think you could attest to that. I do think of other people and I am empathetic, but it's a fault of mine sometimes because I have been, I'm so hyper independent and I have been on my own for so long. My default is just to think of myself. And that's like gotten me into, not into some trouble, but gotten me into some difficult conversations and friendships, especially where I've had to like sit down. And this is why I'm so. I have such deep friendships because like, we are all capable of having deep conversations like this. And I, none of us are perfect, but I've had these deep conversations where I've had a bit like literally look at myself and be like, no, I'm wrong. Like I, and I would have to tell them like, I'm sorry. I it's an active thing for me to have to be like, Oh, how is this going to affect this person in my life? Like I have to actively. Force, not force myself, but remind myself to think of that. Cause I just will be like, I make all of my decisions for me and me only. And I have for a long time,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

sense.

Track 1:

I'm 28 years old. I've not had like a serious relationship since I was what? Fucking 21 since I was with the person I moved here with. So it's like, I've just been on my fucking own for so long.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Mm hmm.

Track 1:

So I have to like actively think of other, how, how like my actions are going to affect the people around me. But

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Yeah.

Track 1:

think as I've aged, I've gained more empathy,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Yeah, I think so.

Track 1:

but you have always, you were, but like, you have always had it in you. Like, and like your default is thinking of other people,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Yeah. Mm hmm.

Track 1:

you know?

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

a pro and a con that I have to deal, that I deal with a lot.

Track 1:

Yeah. I mean, both sides are pros and cons. I think it's good that I think of myself in a lot of situations. Cause I. at the end of the day, I've been fucked over and burned and hurt by so many people at the end of the fucking day. Like, I just, I just know that I have myself. And as long as like the decisions I make for my life are in the right place, then I'm good,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Mm hmm. Mm

Track 1:

that also, I do have very deep relationships with people, so I have to think about them too.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Yeah, I like often put people but people in their like well being before mine and like Jose had pointed out out to me when we started dating and that was the first time I realized that um, like I am being more like putting myself first and what I want to do instead of like like it could literally quite be like at dinner with somebody and I wanted the last roll but someone else was like, does anybody want it? I'm never gonna be like I want the last roll like you

Track 1:

will be like, bitch, snooze, you lose, bitch.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

it's like those kind of things but Like I'm just so like in this reminding me of this thing that happened to me yesterday I Just am I'm so empathetic towards people and it scares me because like yesterday I went to Kroger to go grocery shopping You I'm walking outside with my car and there's a guy in a car right up like right next to my car Like he's like driving but like so our cars are kind of perpendicular to each other I walked to the back and I'm trying to open my trunk and he stops and this is older man and I can't hear him. Like he's talking so softly. I can't hear him and I'm like looking at him and he's saying something and I hear like Augusta and gas money I go, I'm sorry, sir. I don't have any cash on me. I can't, I don't have any cash on me. And he just kind of like gives me a look. And I'm then like in my mind, I'm thinking to myself, like, I want to help him. But like, I feel like if I step closer to this car, someone's going to grab me, you know? Like that's why he's talking so softly. Cause like

Track 1:

Yeah.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

so softly.

Track 1:

Yeah.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

so then like I started panicking and was like, um, He's kept saying that and I, I, I, all of a sudden I went, sir, I can't help you. And like, I did it like in a really like stern voice that even like surprised me. And he was like, okay. And then he like drove off. And I like quickly like put my shit in the car and like went and got in my car. And I got home and I was telling Jose about that story. And he was like, good, I'm proud of like, good job. And I was like, I know, like, that was like, like good for me to do that. Like I would, I would have wanted to help that man And I was like, I just got scared like, you know, all the shit

Track 1:

Yeah.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

so scared

Track 1:

I know. You can't fuck with people like that.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

No, and it's

Track 1:

I know

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

that's like I got in my car and I thought that like that's so sad that that It could have just been an old man who truly just needed help But like i'm a woman who feels unsafe because people

Track 1:

they feed off of it though. Like I know. And I have, and I was having a conversation with the guy that I'm like kind of dating now about it the other day. And I was like, cause we were driving somewhere. And we're in the car and there was like a guy like and we're in the middle of the fucking city So they're ever I mean like there's people everywhere and i've dealt with it for years and years and years and I Am a sucker for it. Like i've given people so much money. I've called tow trucks for homeless people i've called like,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Mm

Track 1:

you know, like i'm just a sucker for it, but One time, like, and more than one time, this is like one time I was pumping gas at this gas station that is notoriously known. I should not have even been there. It's notoriously known as the Murder Mart. In charlotte because it's like people get like shot up and shit at this fucking gas station But it's the closest one to my job and like one time like I was leaving and i'm in the nightlife So it's a fucking middle of the night And I was like fuck I need to get gas and this is when I lived all the way in valentine So I couldn't just like swing it and like drive down the street like I can now So I stopped at this gas station, right? It's like 2. 30 in the fucking morning and I'm pumping my gas. This was like two years ago, so I make better decisions now. And this homeless man walks up to me and is like, You got money, like blah blah blah, and I'm like, No. And like, I've had to get like super like, curt with people cause I'm in the city.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Yeah.

Track 1:

Like, I'm gonna, it's every fucking day, you know. So I was like, No. And especially in the middle of the night at a gas station. I'm an attractive woman. I'm like coming off of my nightlife job. So I look like I'm, you know, I'm like dressed up nice.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Amy's

Track 1:

So I'm not, yeah.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

like you're a stripper.

Track 1:

I'm not a

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

You were just dressed nicely.

Track 1:

I was dressed nicely. I mean,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Yeah,

Track 1:

Did I tell you that you've heard the story when that guy thought I was a stripper, right?

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

yeah. yeah.

Track 1:

Oh my God. That shit is so fucking funny. Um,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Anyways.

Track 1:

um, and I was like, no. And I, you like, can't make eye contact. And he goes, no. And I'm like, I don't have cash. And he's like, can you cash at me? I said, I looked up at him and I was like, can I cash app you? You got a fucking iPhone. Get the fuck out of here, bro. Can you got cash app? And I was just like, I like looked him in the eyes and I was like, no.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Sell your phone. God dang.

Track 1:

So stupid.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

type of shit, like, when we lived in Philly. And I guess that's where I kind of learned to be more stern, but Even, like, I tell Jose all the time, because we have homeless people here where we live too, like in Philly, the homeless people in Philly were a lot nicer than the homeless people here. Yeah.

Track 1:

Yeah.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

sit there and have conversations with these homeless people and if you didn't want to give money, they were like, Alright, we get it. Whatever. But like, The people here are nasty sometimes.

Track 1:

Like that. You're right. Because one time when I lived in Atlanta and when we went out for Thanksgiving and did like, um, that like food drive and shit that I did, I remember one time we like went to like this park where all these homeless people were and they were like fucking complaining About like the food we were giving them and I'm like, are you fucking okay?

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Yeah, you're gonna be picking and choosing?

Track 1:

Yeah.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Yeah. Yeah. Um. Yeah, that's a whole other conversation I guess.

Track 1:

Anyways, what are you reading this week?

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

to ask that. I, so the book we were talking about last week that I didn't name was Light Lark, finished that one and

Track 1:

Did you like it?

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

I'm reading, no, I've read it before. And so I wanted to give it a second chance'cause she came out with a sequel and I'm interested in where the plot goes. It's one of those books that like the plot's so good. Like, it, it truly, like, the plot's great, the execution's horrible. And like, if the execution was great, like, I swear this book would be up there with like Fourth Wing.

Track 1:

Really Damn

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

that's how she got her book sold was because it is a good plot, but it is in line with, like, Divine Rivals of, like, the writing's just not good, it's very straightforward, the two, like, love interests don't even have any chemistry. Like it's just that type of thing. So I'm reading it for the plot to see what happens, but It's just not my favorite series

Track 1:

my, I was, what did I do the other night? Why was I home? I don't remember, but I decided to take like, I think it was one of my nights off and I was like, I'm just gonna do nothing tonight. And I, um, decided to watch a movie. And I like, didn't know what I wanted to watch and I ended up watching The Tearsmith on Netflix.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Mm hmm.

Track 1:

Which is a novel, it's like a movie based off of a book. And I'm like, okay. Let me just watch it and it's an Italian book. That's now in English and So the movie is Italian. So it's just like voiceovers of like them speaking English Yeah And I was watching it and I I started watching it like the first like 20 minutes and I'm like bitch You should just read this book because you you know, this movie's about to suck ass But like it was like such a good plot and I'm like, I would love, I'd be so into this book and I'm like, nah, fuck it. You could still read the book, but it's like a 500 page book and I'm like, I can't commit to another long ass book right now. Let me just watch the fucking movie. And I watched the movie and I was like, I have to read this book.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Oh.

Track 1:

So I called Chloe or I'm like texting Chloe cause she's my book friend and we like read the same type of shit. So I'm like texting Chloe and I'm like, bitch, I'm watching the Tearsmith. We have to read this fucking book. And she like ran to target and bought the book. So we're going to read it. The movie is so bad. So bad.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

are good, because

Track 1:

I know the book's going to be good. It's like that type of movie. Like, it's like the type of movie that's like, you know, the book is so fucking good and They just Couldn't

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Yeah.

Track 1:

do it in a movie. Yeah.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

I think that, I think this series is getting a, I don't know if it's a TV show or if it's going to be a movie. hopefully they do good because it is a great but that's just it's Jose kept keeps being like, is it a good do you? Like your book and I'm like, no like it's just disappointing

Track 1:

What book? The Lights.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

that one the light lurk and then the sequels called night Bane

Track 1:

Dude, I am almost done. I'm almost done with Bride.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

I'm reading that next because we're reading that

Track 1:

I

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

a few weeks

Track 1:

love it so much. I love it. It's so good.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

it

Track 1:

It's so cute. Like I just fucking love it. I think you'll like it.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

it just werewolves?

Track 1:

No, it's werewolves and vampires.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Hmm. Yeah, I'm excited to read this one.

Track 1:

Yeah,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

I have this

Track 1:

I think you'll like it.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

and then Butcher in the Wren, and then Again by Kate Goldbeck. Those are my three

Track 1:

So I finished this, I'm almost done with Pride, and then I started The Devil's Night series. Um, which is just like a dark romance series, it's four books. But I'm really liking that one too. But, So, okay, so this guy that I talked about last week, right?

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

mm

Track 1:

Have gone back and forth So I was all hype about him last week on the episode and then things kind of went downhill and I pulled back a little bit and then I was like, you know what? Let me just like Try again a little bit

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

hmm,

Track 1:

So last night we were talking and um, he said So I haven't seen him since um our last like date and it's been Like a week and a half probably since i've seen him and um We were talking like about like maybe doing something today. And I'm like, I'm off. And I was like, I kind of like want to like go out. Like I want to, I don't want to like be in the house. I don't want to like do like a movie night or anything. Like I want to like go out to dinner or do something. And he goes, let's go to Barnes and Noble. I said, okay.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Don't ask me twice.

Track 1:

I was like, that sounds like a great idea. And he was like, yeah, let's go to, what did he say? He said, um, Hold on, let me read and like this is why I'm like so upset because and not even upset but just like Fuck Amy like he's so great like on paper like and everything he says is just like perfect But what did he say? He said? He said Barnes Noble I said Barnes Noble sounds perfect and He said we've been to my style places. I want to experience you I said, okay.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Dial up. Let's do that.

Track 1:

I like that. I like that a lot.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

This screen just froze. Let me

Track 1:

No. So, we're gonna go to Barnes Noble tonight and then go have dinner. And I'm so excited because everybody that I've ever dated before So, we're Like everyone that I've ever dated before hasn't given a fuck about my number one hobby, which is fucking reading. They could have given a fuck like my ex, who's obviously a notably and very known as the worst human to ever be pushed out of a vagina. Um, I would be like, that was a lot. I would be like, can I tell you about my book? Can I tell you about my book? And he'd be like, no, I don't care.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Yeah. Pass.

Track 1:

fucking, what a rude ass bitch. So I'll be excited. Like, so this guy's like, yeah, we can like go to Barnes and Noble and like get you some books and then sit. Um, he was like, yeah, we'll just like sit and I'm just excited to like get books and then to go have dinner and sit and like talk to him about the books that I want to read.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Yeah. That'll be fun.

Track 1:

I'm going to go to the gym.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Yeah.

Track 1:

gonna get dressed go to the gym. I'm gonna wash my sheets. I haven't done that in a minute Oh, I started using have you heard of buff city soaps? Love them look it up Like all natural soaps and shit for like laundry. I started using it. It's great So I'm gonna wash my sheets and just do shit like that today and then go on my date tonight Should be across him. Maybe I'll finish bride today. I'm almost done with it

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Yep. Alright.

Track 1:

Okay, you're such a Capricorn bro. You're like, whenever you're done, you're done.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

It's

Track 1:

You are.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Well, I'm trying to think, because I usually have the outro written down, but it's not working. So, I'm trying to think what it is.

Track 1:

It's so funny. I like saw something the other day about Capricorns and I was like, this is Abby. Such a fucking Capricorn. Like whenever you're done, you're just done. Like, and like on the phone too. Like I'll never forget one time I was on the phone.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Go ahead.

Track 1:

Well, one time I was in the car with Melanie and I called you and you were like through my speakers, right? On like the, on my phone and you were like, hello. And I was like, Hey, like trying to like have a conversation with you. And you're just like, yeah, yeah. I guess. And I'm like, okay, well, you seem busy. I was like, okay. And you were like, no, I just, I don't know what else to say. And I was like, okay, bye. And Melanie was like, what the fuck?

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

a

Track 1:

I'm like, that's, I know. But I'm like, that's just Abby. Like she, like, if she don't have nothing to say, she's like, what? Okay.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

That's like, Jose all the time is always like, Are you in a bad mood? And I'm like, No, I'm fine. I just don't have anything to say. Well, sorry. Yeah, well,

Track 1:

Like, and then I was just like, you're just like, Yeah. okay, I guess hit and you've

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

the middle of something. I am very like, cut short. But,

Track 1:

always been like that though. Like on the phone, like you're horrible on the phone. You're just like, yeah,

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

sometimes.

Track 1:

okay, we're done here. It's funny. I'm like, Abby, I'm just trying to talk shit. You're just like, yeah.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Well, what to say to that?

Track 1:

That's funny.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

All right, guys. Well, uh, You can follow us on Instagram at my sister made me read it podcast. Amy is Amy Pretorati. I am Abby Pretorati on Instagram. Follow us there. They're linked below in the show description. Read us on the platform you're listening to. Uh, we are doing Bride for the next episode, which I think will probably be in two weeks. Um, so read that and hear our review because I think we didn't really talk much about the book this week, but we'll definitely be talking about a lot about Bride.

Track 1:

Yeah, I think so, I love it.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

I think that's about it.

Track 1:

Woohoo!

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

Woohoo! Alright.

Track 1:

Okay, bye.

abby_2_04-17-2024_104708:

to you later.

People on this episode

Head Shot

Abby Preteroti

Co-host
Head Shot

Amy Preteroti

Co-host

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